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Jordyn's first day

I woke up this morning to a shake and a poke from an innocent 5 yr old anxiously awaiting her first day of Kindergarten. We have spent the last year counting down the days on the calendar when this day would come. I was filled with anxiousness and excitement for her up until this afternoon. As her name was called and she went to her teacher and got her name tag and everything she needed for her desk, I felt proud and overwhelmingly sad at the same time. Where the HELL did time go??? It almost seemed increasingly unfair that all of a sudden I am forced to learn how to let go. Not totally, but a little bit. She was so proud of her Hannah Montana shoes she was FINALLY able to wear, she had to show them to any and every willing person that would look and smile. And don't get me started on her black and pink Hello Kitty backpack. I wasn't worried one iota that she would have a problem making friends in her first year of school. The boy she had been talking to before class began only wanted to talk about his cool batman backpack, and all she wanted to talk about were those damn Hannah Montana shoes. So she moved on to a group of girls that were instantly drawn to those shoes of hers. Leave it to kids to make something so innocent seem so simple. If only everything in her life would be this easy. So as I sit here reminiscing about the first time I found out I was pregnant with her, how much weight I gained, and how it felt the first time I held her, I am humbled that God would choose me to mother this child. Everything that I have ever done in my life has led up to this point. And I can honestly say, I wouldn't change a thing.

Baby boy

In a few hours it will officially be my baby boy's first birthday. I can't hardly believe how fast this past year has gone. It's been quite the rough year, but we survived, and to say the least, I couldn't be happier how it all turned out. I can't seem to imagine my life without him. Even when I was pregnant and scared and wasn't sure about anything. It saddens me to think that the first year has flown by this fast and the next stage in his life is eminent. I will celebrate with him, even though he won't remember. So to say the least, if I'm not on here at all on this day, it's because I'm doing the mommy thing with my birthday boy.

First day of school

Ok ... so for those that know me .. I have 2 kids .. a 4 yr old girl and a 10 month old son. Jordyn, the girl, will be starting Kindergarten in the fall for the '08/'09 school year. I can't help myself but feel somewhat sad. It seems like just yesterday I was holding her in my arms for the first time. I can't hardly believe just how fast time has gone, and it hardly seems fair. Maybe I more nervous for myself about this part of letting go. I don't think she's going to be the one with seperation anxiety...I will be. When I was pregnant with her I was scared of being a horrible parent, but I think every parent goes through that. Now, I can't imagine my life without her. It's amazing how much she has taught ME, and continues to do so every day. One of the greatest things about having children .... you get to relive your childhood all over again and have fun doing it. I knew the day would come that I would have to allow her to gain some independance and that I wouldn't be able to be there 24/7 like I am now. I just never imagined it would creep up on me like it has. Know this .. no matter if it's kindergarten or a senior in college ... she will always be my little girl.
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