Why is it that people will tell you things you would rather not know to make themselves feel better? A few weeks ago a man I realized I truly loved (not i love him and i want to be with him the rest of my life, but I love him and would do anything to make him happy even if that one thing is leave)told me to get out of his life. I was under the belief that we had grown apart, out lives were too diffrent and we worked too much and it was just better that way. Last night he informed me that he left me and broke my heart over an internet affair, right here on fubar. He chose what could have been a fat 40yr old man over the flesh and blood woman that had proven time and time again that she loved him. I just don't understand it? How can it hurt so bad, and why don't I have the urge to break him in any way that i could? Why can't I say that if he asked me to come home that I would refuse? Why after all of this do I still wish he were mine, and will it ever go away?
He told me this other person broke his heart by leaving him for someone else. Part of me wants to laugh in his face. Hell, the phrase karma is a bitch comes to mind, but another part of me wants to hold him dry his tears and tell him even though i got scared my heart hasen't left his hand. I just don't know how much of it is left to break. I don't want advice... nothing anyone could say will change the situation, but an empathetic word may ease my pain slightly and I could use all the sunshine I can get right now as my world seems to have fallen into an endless night.
