emotionalbypass's blog: "sugarsweet"

What do you do when all else fails? What do you do when it seems you have no where to run? What do you do when you are up agianst all odds? Everyone dancing around you happy as can be. They all wearing the pretty little smiles and not showing that they are hurting too. You watch and listen when all you really want to do is scream and hollor out help me. What do you do ? You tell your friends that you are alright. And that you are doing good. But deep down inside it is hurting you. It is eating at you. You don't know what it is But you don't know how to find it out the root of it either. what do you do ? How do you cope? Is there any hope? The kids play and ride there bikes and there happy as long as you don't show that your hurting. They laugh and giggle all day long. They cuddle at night with you. But what do you do ? After there in bed all tucked in tight. Sleeping and off in dream land. It is suppose to be your time to relax and rethink the day. But all you can do is ask yourself why am I feeling this way/ Why can't I figure out the problem? After all I am suppose to know myself better than anyone else. What do you do ? There is yelling there is arguing there is all kinds of mixed emotions through out the day. How can you justify them all. How can you sort through them all. What do you do ? Is it normal to feel this way? You feel distant from the world. You feel distant from your family and you never thought it would be possible but you feel distant from your children most of all. Your friends may or may not show that they care. But even if they did show they cared you stay closed . What do you do? You know it is not healthy holdin these feelings inside. And you know that there is that Special somone that could get through to you and help you out. but he is not around. What do you do ? Where do you turn? How do you exscape the prison inside of yourself. You hear people say it is just a phaze you are going through and that it will pass with time. but you know that it is much deeper than that. You don't know why you don't know what you don't know when and you don't know what or where and you have to find out. What do you do ? It leaves you all mixed up inside one minute you laugh the next minute your crying the next your not even talking anymore. Your not even trying. What do you do ?

So we go through life trying to teach our kids lessons that we think that will be important to them. And we tell them that they have to have respect for others to receive it. But they get that all confused when we yell at them for treating us the same way they treat us and we say that they are our kids and we can treat them the way we want cuz they are kids well that is just not so. and that is when they lose all respect for us as adults. We should treat them the way that we want them to treat us and others. Am I write or am I wrong?

Well now that all the cooking is done and the presents were opened today. I can honestly say over all we had a pretty good day. My boys had there friend over with his sister and she was riding his bike and ran over the Fast and Furious remote control car that I got my son for Christmas but accidents happen right? Then we had another episode were 3 boys had tried to take my sons bike from him. And lets not forget the episode where we walked to the convinent store and my 4yr old was riding his bike down hill and did not use his breaks and almost got ran over. Scared me and Guy. But we had a pretty good day. We had ham and turkey. Green Bean caserole, macaroni and cheese with broccoli, candied yams, stuffing, gravy, deviled eggs, Jello, double layer pumpkin pie, cherry pie, lemon merigue pie, fried apples, christmas cookies, peanut butter cookies and oatmeal raisin cookies. WOW Looking back on it now that is a big dinner. The boys enjoyed riding there bikes and had fun doing tricks on them. They were mostly all smiles today and Hardly no fighting went on. We watched the parade on tv, read books, and had a blast as we try to do everyday. But I am afraid with all the home cooking that I did that they will never want to leave home. LOL or they will and return for that homecookin meal.LOL Just looking back on the day as it comes to an end.

Around the Holidays it is not hard to get stressed out. After all there is so much to do get the decorations out, and put them up, make decorations with the kids, The cooking and the baking, sending and receiving Christmas Cards to people you know and some you don't know, Receiving Christmas cards from people you barely know cuz Christmas is the only time you hear from them is Christmas time. and the list can go on and on. I think that is so important for us to take time out for ourselves and treat ourselves around this time of the year. It is not being selfish to do so. And it can put us in better health. Weather we realize it or not. I think that when we take time for out for ourselves we tend to be a lot less stressed and it makes our lives better. We spend our time doing things for others and pleasing others that we forget about the things that we want. And sometimes we have that voice in our heads that says "I don't want to be selfish so I am not going to take the time for myself" But we are not being selfish we are just bettering our lives and trying to make it a lot less stressful. so I challenge you all to take time for yourselves and see if it don't help you out in our life. Exspecially during the Holiday season. And don't feel guilty about it either cuz when it comes down to it you deserve it. MERRY CHRISTMAS to you all. And may your Christmas wishes come true this year.

I am sweet I am a mother I am a wife I am a friend I am honest I am kind I am loving I am open minded I am caring I am not forgotten I am me I am Understanding I usually write about things that come to my mind or what is on my mind. Sometimes what I write may come from the heart other times it is just me babbling on about a subject. I consider myself open minded cuz I believe life is to short to sit and wait for things to happen. We ourselves are the only ones that can make things in our life happen and work out. There is no need in dwelling in the past cuz that is the past all we have is the future and we have to work on that and make it better. I am a friend to those that need a friend and if you ever need to talk I am the one that wouldn't mind listening. I would say that I am talented but I have no clue to as what my talent is or would be.

I am a wife to my husband whom I have been Married to for 6yrs. I am a mother to my four boys. I enjoy the outdoors, playing cards, chatting online, surfing the web, playing playstation, watchin movies, and listenin to music. I am me and you have to either except me just as I am or don't except me at all. I don't try to be someone I am not and I don't change for no one I live my life for me and if I change for anyone it is for myself and because I wanted to. So I am just as I am. I am open and honest and do speak my mind. And sometimes I may even speak my mind without thinking what I am saying but that is just me. I do work hard at everything I do. And do my best at all. I believe there is no point in starting something if your not going to work hard at it and finish it. But that is just me and that is the way I am and you have to except me just as I am or not at all. I don't let what others think of me bother me Because I am who I am and I live with me. And as long as I am happy about myself that is all that matters. After all it is going to be me that answers for my actions not anyone else. That is just how I am. I believe in living life to its fullest and enjoying every minute of it while we can we never know when our day will be up and what may happen the next day. All we have is this moment right here to worry about the rest are not promised to us. Well I guess that pretty much wraps it up. I am just as I am.