That Northern Guhl's blog: "Rape!"

She walks by With head held low. A lowly cry And you know. You know why Yet you don't care. Deep in your soul Nothing is there. You're sponge old & dirty Absorbing her pain. Taking away her security Her emotions you drain. You know what you've done And so do your friends. On her shoulders she'll carry a ton Her pain will never end. She used to smile She used to laugh. It's something you can't reconsile The pain is on her behalf. You see her cry From her pain she can't escape. You watch her fall and die Did you know what you did was rape?

The first part of this is true, but the last part of it was the worst dream I even had. About three years ago I met someone I thought he was special We had so much fun As time went by I finally saw He wasn't the one I wanted after all I found him cheating When he thought I had left It was finally over That was the end A year later he called To see what I was up to I told him I was happy And I hoped he was too A little while later A friend called to say He was put in jail For harassment and rape I guess that's exactly What he deserved He was dumb enough I felt bad for the girl Then six months ago I heard he was released That he had a hit list Number one being me I wasn't scared It didn't bother me at all Until one night I got a threatening call The weird things started Happening in my house Doors would slam shut And lights were turned out In the middle of the night Someone came in my room The sound of a gun clicked I was too scared to move He motioned me up And grabbed me by my hair Then slammed me down Into my computer chair He threatened to kill me If I tried to get away He stripped me and tied me up Then put his gun away He turned on the light So I could see his face He knew I was scared So he moved at a slow pace He stuck his fingers Into my clit The next thing that went Was his tongue, then his dick Right at that moment I wished I were dead I could do nothing but cry And hope it would end I looked over at my clock Forty-five minutes had past I wondered how much longer All this would last Finally it was over It came to an end He threatened one more time If I told I'd be dead When I could finally talk I asked why he did this The next thing I knew My face met his fist I woke up in the hospital All I felt was pain I remember what happened And wondered if he'd do it again I was scared to death I feared for my life I know I wouldn't be strong enough To put up a good fight This is my story And that's how it ends So scared to tell anyone Even my own friends If you're ever stuck In the same place I was Do yourself a favor And tell someone

So there we were Sitting on your bed You asking me again To give you head You knew I'd say no And change the subject I asked you about your Little plastic car set You started getting mad And grabbed for a knife You held it to my throat And threatened to take my life I started crying hysterically But you didn't even care You just called me pathetic And grabbed a handful of hair You undid your pants And sat on the down Threatening to kill me If I tried to get out You pushed me down Slammed me on my knees Then you looked at me And said ?do as you please' I just sat there Looking up at you Tears covered my face Wondering what all you'd do You grabbed my jaw And slammed it in my throat You stood there and laughed Knowing it was making me choke You kept right on going Moving my head Until you were finished Then you threw me on the bed You completely stripped me Then climbed on top You stuck it in And you wouldn't stop I couldn't scream I was too scared All I could do was cry Not that you cared You just kept on going Knowing it would damage me Everything I stood for Was stolen with my virginity It was finally over You finished at last But that was something I could never put in the past You threw my clothes at me Told me to get dressed You did the same Told me to look my best Make it seem like Nothing happened to me No one would know By just looking at me I got home that night I wanted to die But I'm scared of pain So there was no reason to try I laid in bed thinking About what I just went through Then you opened my door And walked right in my room I stood up real fast To grab something heavy I was going to throw it If you tried anything with me But by the time I found something I was hit hard in the face Over and over you hit me Telling me this was my place I was here for you pleasure To use, abuse, and play with To constantly hurt me Because I was nothing but a bitch You finally quit hitting me And got up of the floor You looked at me one more time Then you were out the door I just sat there thinking Was that all I was good for? Was I really worthless? Well I won't take it anymore I walked in the basement Knowing I wouldn't come back Because of everything he did Self-esteem was something I lacked I took a piece of rope And hung it from the rafter Remembering what he did Listening to his constant laughter He ran through the door I stepped of the chair He was screaming for me I could hear him upstairs Someone must have told him That I was down here Because the last thing I saw Was his face covered in tears He ran over to me And cut me down with a knife But it was too late My body had no life

There is no difference between being raped and being pushed down a flight of stairs except that the wounds bleed on the inside. There is no difference between being raped and being run over by a truck except that afterward men ask if you enjoyed it. There is no difference between being raped and going head first through a windshield except that afterward you are afraid not of cars but half the human race.

Enshrouded in a cloak of purple blackness, the Sky glared in rage at her foreign, swollen belly. "I cannot survive this birth!" she shouted. "When this monstrous child of Pollution is born, I will die!" Upon observing the Moon seated comfortably on the horizon, the Sky howled in fury. "You could have helped me! You didn't do anything! You heartless stone! You sat and watched! And for that I curse you!" Glistening with indigo beads of sweat, the Sky started raining in anguish. "I saw nothing," responded the Moon in a cool voice. "I saw nothing unusual." Hearing the Moon's unfeeling words, the Sky began to scream. "Nothing unusual! Nothing unusual! Oh, how I despise your pale indifference! From the balcony of your royal carriage you have witnessed every dark and destructive moment since original night. While shining your dismal lantern, you have gazed down on horrors I can not speak of without revulsion. You have driven to madness simple dreamers! You have torn the hearts of gentle lovers! Of course you saw nothing unusual! Your eyes are frozen in the ice of boredom! Your skin is choking beneath the dust of apathy!" The Moon was startled by these accusations. He slowly wandered for a few miles before turning to the Sky and asking, "Why do you blame me? I have done nothing to hurt anyone. Maybe I am cold; I am not the Sun, and I will never be a Star. I keep to myself and live in a peaceful, dignified manner." After the Moon spoke, the Sky, in a voice thick with sorrow and resignation, exclaimed, "Don't you understand what has happened to me will affect us all. Our fate is permanently woven together. If I cannot survive this ill-conceived birth, if I perish in the agony of un-natural labor, this ancient cloak around my body will become a threadbare curtain over the coffin of Life."

I wake to a knife on the back of my neck, a man's voice low in my ear. What I am told to do, I do. Still the moon lights my room. The freight of his chest fixes me to the rough, wood floor. His breath brags down my throat into my lungs, and I pray for my soul. I make of my body a bunker: when he enters, he does not touch me. I am clean as rain.