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1. Last akward moment? I don't really remember 2. Who do you find yourself crushing on currently? nobody really 3. Have you ever fallen backwards down a set of stairs? yep 4. Ever been to a friends house and starved the whole time? actually yea 5. Ever found more than a dollar in a random place? I found $50 in a pair of pants that I thought I had lost 6. Name someone close to you who smokes cigarettes? Me, Julie (sometimes, Becca, Sherri, Sheila, Joseph 7. Name 3 things that everyone knows: 1) Sublime is the shit 2) I love alcohol 3) I love tobacco 8. When a friend walks out of your life, do you go after them, or let them go? go after them, but if they keep running then they're on there own 9. Have you ever been corrected at your workplace? my latest job? no 10. Has anyone ever been more important to you than a family member? Yep, she still is alot of times 11. Do you still live at home? yea, nobody wants to rent to me 12. Last time you smiled? it's been quite a while, just haven't really had much to smile about lately 12. What do you do when a telemarketer calls? either ignore the call or pick up and yell as loud as I can "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?" 13. Would life be the same without alcohol? No, it would be kinda boring for me 14. Would you go a month without washing your hair to save a loved one? I guess so 15. Would you cry if you found out you were pregnant? i dunno... i didn't know that was possible... 16. Have you had "the best night of your life?" Yea, nothing has topped it yet 17. Do you think your current pets will be alive ten years from now? maybe, some tarantulas have been known to live up to 20 years, and mine will be a year old in september 18. Ever had sex in the bathroom? plenty of times in the shower, ooh thats nice.... 19. When was your last bubble bath? umm, when I was 6 maybe? 20. Do you know anyone by the name of Dennis? Umm, yea, Coach Corn 21. What was the last thing you ate? Double Whopper and fries 22. Where is your pet right now? sitting on my leg looking at me 23. Name five things you did last night? 1. Made a new friend 2. Had a long talk with someone 3. Listened to music 4. Had some whiskey 5. and got no sleep as usual 24. Last time you consumed alcohol? couple minutes ago 25. What color phone do you have? silver razr with a red case 26. How many kids do you have? none 27. What outfit do you have on at this exact moment? blue jeans, HIM t-shirt, and new balance 28. Have you ever been in love? yep 29. When was the last time you drank a martini? a few minutes ago 30. What are you doing tomorrow?? same thing I do every day, which is pretty much nothing 31. Do you know someone who likes you? yea, a couple people... 32. Have you ever had a friend named "Fred, Frank, or Felipe?" nope 33. Name three people you met in the past two months? Robby, Sami, and Randy 34. What color is your hair? dirty blonde 35. Do you think any of your ex's still look good? one... she's had a few kids but she still looks pretty good 36. Have you ever said "I Love You" and not meant it? only once really, I had it as a line in a play 37. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? yea 38. What is the closest green object to you? umm, a stuffed frog 39. Have you ever been teased really bad? yea, it depends on what kind of teasing u wanna know about though... 40. Do you still have feelings for anyone from your past? a little, not much i can do about it though, she died a couple years ago 41. Did you enjoy your last kiss from a girl? yes, it was from someone very special 42. Do you believe in ghosts? yep 43. Have you eaten popcorn in the past 48 hours? no 44. Do you have a lot of guy friends? no 45. Do you have a friend with benefits? no 46. Who was the last person you drove with? my boss 47.Would you chew gum after someone else already has? no, there have been a few exceptions in the past though 48. What song describes your relationship status? Right Here by Staind 49. How much does your dog weigh? which one? one weighs about 15 lbs and the other weighs about 80lbs 50. Are you a heart breaker, or the broken heart? broken heart 51. Ever been skinny dipping? yea 52. Earrings or necklace? necklace for me, don't have my ears pierced... 53. Who have you talked to most today? My boss 54. Color of your shirt? black with a purple heartagram on it 55. Who's on speed dial 2? Julie 56. What color is your background on your computer mainscreen? I dunno, it's the default one on Vista, even though I'm running XP, shhh, don't tell nobody... 57. Do you wish on 11:11? no 58. Good advice if you ever go camping? Don't do it!!!! 59. Are you A BAD influence? sometimes, he he he 60. What color are your eyes? Blue, but they can be green or grey or sometimes black 61. Would you rather have your name or your siblings name? i'll stick with my name 62. Would you do anything for someone? yea 63. Have you ever been called a bitch? yea 64. Favorite color? purple, black, silver, red, green, blue 65. What song is on? Santeria by Sublime 66. Would you date anyone on your friends list? yea 67. Does your best friend have a myspace? yea, but she's hardly ever on... 68. Who's page did you visit last? umm, I can't remember 69. Do you watch the Gilmore Girls? oh hell no 70. Have you ever enjoyed listening to Jack Johnson? yea, I find his voice to be kinda soothing at times 71. Have you ever seen or enjoyed watching the O.C.? NOOOOOO 72. Do you have one or more Britney Spears C.D.s? what kinda fuckin question is that? Hell no I don't have no damn britney spears shit 73. Are you a "Lost" fanatic? no 74. Still have pictures of your ex? i got one or two still floatin around here somewhere 75. Do you have a song by Ozzy Osbourne in your library? Yes, several 76. Do you watch Family Guy Regularly? somewhat regularly 77. King of the Hill? not really 78. Do you read trashy romance novels often? nope 79. Do you sing obnoxiously in the car? sometimes, do i sing obnoxiously? 80. Do you sing obnoxiously in the shower when no one's home? yea, i hope I'm not obnoxious when I sing 81. Have you ever watched a little kid's show yea, Dora The Explorer, come on now 82. Have you ever pretended your crush was with you when they weren't? Yea, just to get someone to shut up and let me get off the phone. 83. Did you draw pictures for your first crush back in elementary school? no, but I did write her a letter, and afterwards I got my ass kicked by her brother and was labeled as a faggot for the rest of the year.... sorry, but I wasn't doing like some of the other boys in my class and holding another boys hand, I was tryin to hold a girls hand, so tell me who's the real faggot here? 84. Have you ever liked a girl/boy but didn't ask her/him out because you were afraid? Yea, i really like a girl, but I couldn't bring myself to ask her out because I was afraid she's get mad and wouldn't even want to be friends anymore... 85. Have you ever written a poem or story about your life? yea 86. Have you ever spent over an hour thinking about nothing but a certain person? Yea, there's one person who is on my mind 24-7 87. Have you ever liked someone solely because of their appearance? nope 88. Do you eat all the servings in the food groups on a daily basis? nope 89. Are you ever a freak about cleanliness or organization? sometimes 90. Have you ever been to South America or Africa? no, and I don't plan on going 91. Do you know how to knit? nope 92. Do you have a cell phone or iPod with a patterned cover? no, not unless u count red as being a pattern 93. Have you ever written love song lyrics yourself and put them in a song? yea 94. Do you keep a diary or journal online? yea, i don't really update it too often though 95. When you open your closet, what is the dominant color? black 96. Baskin Robbins or Coldstone? Breyers 97. Physics or chemistry? physics, i never took chemistry 98. Earphones or headphones? earphones 99. Pink or Teal? purple 100. Earrings or a ring? ring 101. Commitment or casual dating? commitment 102. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, or Star Wars? umm, i guess i'm gonna say harry pot-head 103. Fly or road trip? alone, fly; with friends, road trip 104. Starbucks? well, if ur payin sure why not 105. Have you ever bought clothing at nordstrom? what the hell is that?
This is some pretty good stuff... not really enough alcohol to get u drunk but still pretty good. Maybe I'll be able to try the other brands sometime soon.
I saw this posted amongst the stash for SexxxiMilf. Not sure how I cam across it, but I did. Anyways, after reading this, I just couldn't resist posting it for my friends on here to see. It was just too funny. Also, if anyone has 50 or however many mistakes men make during sex, please post it or send it to me, I would love to see it. Anyways, without further hesitation, I present to you all, 50 Mistakes Women Make During Sex. 1. Assuming he can get a raging hard on when it suits you. Contrary to popular belief, men can't just flip a switch and get it up because you decided to stop being a frigid bitch. Getting it hard is your job. I suggest you figure it out. 2. Thinking that kissing needs to be this sweet romantic thing all the time. Sometimes pressing your lips against your partners mouth while you get off is the hot. It depends on the situation. 3. Leaving him responsible for your orgasm. You know what gets you off. Tell him. If you don't, it's your own fault when he's snoozing and you're all wound up. 4. Expecting him to cuddle. Men and women are wired differently. Sex makes most women want to talk and bond and all that shit. It makes men pass out. It's a biological thing. Stop fighting it, and stop holding it over his head, it's not his fault. 5. Expecting him to fall asleep with you in his arms. That shit is uncomfortable after awhile. A little snuggling isn't unreasonable, but when it's time to actually sleep? An arm draped over you should suffice. 6. Expecting him to always lay on the charm and romance. Sometimes, that's nice. Sometimes. But expecting him to be all roses and candles all the time is like expecting you to act like a pornstar all the time. If you're not willing to do that, don't expect him to switch for you. 7. Being selfish in bed. Regardless of the shit that Cosmo forces down our throats, sex is NOT just about us. Get over it. 8. Using Cosmo as a sex bible. I dont know who comes up with half that shit, but I'm pretty sure they need counseling. 9. Whining when he pushes your head down on his cock instead of stroking your hair. Know why he's pushing, skippy? Because you aren't doing it right, and have apparently ignored the other clues he's given you. Pay attention to the signals that he's sending you. 10. Not moving at all. Missionary is not an excuse to do nothing. 11. Expecting him to undress himself with any amount of grace. He's about to get some pussy. Be glad he bothered to take his pants all the way off. If it concerns you so much, undress him yourself. 12. Not shaving your legs. Im pretty bad at this myself. But if you want your guy stubble free, you better get out the razor. 13. Allowing your crotch to resemble the amazon. Yes, waxing hurts. Yes, some people don't want to go bare. Thats fine. If you like bush, great. If you have sensitive skin and can't shave, I feel for you. But for the love of Christ, trim that shit if you want him to spend any time down there. 14. Assuming that sex means a relationship. The only relationship you have is that he has now stuck his hoo hoo dilly in your cha cha. That's as far as it goes unless otherwise noted. 15. Withholding oral sex just because you're ragging. He didn't do it. Unless you want him to withhold oral sex because he's hormonal, I suggest you get some kneepads. 16. Expecting him to figure out what you like by what noise you make. Use your words. Have you ever actually heard what you sound like while you're having sex? If you heard yourself on tape, and someone asked you to explain what was causing you to make that noise, 67% of women would respond with answers like "I stubbed my toe" "I ran up the steps" or "I was putting up drywall". 17. Leaving condoms up to him. If you're sexually active and insist that he uses a condom, I suggest buying a box and keeping it by your bed. Not all men keep them on them, and it's just as much your responsibility as it is his. If you think that makes you a slut, you shouldn't be having sex anyway. Go back to Jr High. 18. Getting your undies in a bunch when he talks dirty. A little fantasy can be fun. If he treats you with respect all the time, you shouldn't be offended when he calls you his dirty little slut. When he calls you a whore and tells you to come, its his way of showing that he cares if you get off. Stop being a sissy. 19. Refusing to be spontaneous. I know this is shocking, but sometimes sex OUTSIDE of the bedroom is fun. 20. Dissing quickies because it's not some slow sensual ordeal. Sex is a dynamic thing. Theres an awesome raw energy when you only have 20 minutes but having to have someone so bad that you do it half clothed against the wall. Readjust your thinking. 21. Being too much of a pussy to tell him what is or isn't acceptable before you start bumping uglies. Be honest. If he asks if he can poke you in the butt, and you giggle and say no like it's an invitation, don't look surprised when he "accidentally" sticks his cock in your butt. 22. Expecting him to undress you. I put a bra on almost every day. I know for a fact that getting them off isn't always easy. Help a brother out. 23. Undressing in the dark. If youre shy, dim the lights, but give the man something to see. No ripping off the clothes and diving under the covers, either. 24. Refusing to get on top. Theres no reason men should have to do all the work. 25. Getting that bored look on your face. Men are more visual than women. Give him something to look at. Get on top and arch your back a little bit. Move. Do something to indicate that you 1) are not dead and 2) didn't suffer a minor stroke rendering you unable to move. 26. Expecting him to do all the touching when you're riding him. It's your body, you're used to it. Play with your tits, rub your clit, do something to make his job easier. 27. Being too afraid to guide your partner's hand when hes touching you. Don't like the way he's doing it? Gently take his hand and show him how you like it. 28. Getting into bed, getting naked, fooling around and then deciding that you just want to cuddle, then getting offended when he doesn't. Its your choice to stop, but don't look all fucking surprised when he's confused. You got him naked in your bed, what else did you think was going to happen? 29. Refusing to let him take control. So your a feminist. Big fucking deal. Letting him call the shots doesn't make you any less of one. 30. Refusing to take control. Its ok to crawl across a bed to him on all fours, push him down and crawl on top. It's not his responsibility to start things all the time. 31. Forgetting that he has a body that likes to be touched, too. Men have things like backs and shoulders and stomachs and other parts that are fun to kiss and touch. You miss a lot of good places by concentrating solely on his penis. 32. Ignoring his balls. Seriously, they are there. Kiss them, lick them, suck on them, make a relationship with them, just don't ignore them. 33. Leaving him to his own devices. Nothing is worse than a girl who gets you most of the way off and then bolts because she doesn't want to deal with the mess. 34. Launching into some speech about not being an object for sex when he tries to titty fuck you. Jesus Christ, just push them together and enjoy yourself. You get a great view. 35. Expecting him to handle you like a porcelain doll. I'd hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you're not going to break, sister. So doing it against the wall gives you a bruise on your shoulder. Look at it later and giggle at the memory. 36. Refusing to try things in the name of "making love". You're not making anything. You are naked. With another person. Making strange faces and weird noises. Stop romanticizing it. 37. Taking things way too seriously. Sex is funny. Actually it's hilarious. Somewhere along the line, someone is going to fall off of a bed, hit their head on a lighting fixture, accidentally kick a midget or trip over a goat. It's how you deal with it that really matters. 38. Throwing a bitch fit when he asks for a 3 some. Its the American dream. (I know my ex is reading this right now, so a quick interjection. One request for a 3 some is ok. Every 5 minutes, not so much. Knowthe difference). 39. Continuing a blow job knowing that you have god awful cotton mouth. Really. Grab a bottle of water. 40. Nails. Its one thing tracing them up and down your partners back. Its another when you snag the goods with a claw. 42. Not making any noises at all. Moan. Scream his name. Something so he knows he's the best you've had, even if he isn't. 43. Faking orgasms. Just. Don't. By faking (IF he believes you) he thinks he's doing everything right. And if he doesn't know its not working, he's not going to change it. Starting a vicious cycle of unfulfilling sex which will eventually be very damaging to his ego. 44. Not washing before sex. I know that sex is spontaneous, this is more of a general statement. If you haven't showered that day, and things smell a little...fishy...perhaps demanding oral sex is a little ridiculous of you. 45. Anything that involves inserting anything into his body that he has not specifically approved before hand. I don't care what Cosmo says, some things are simply not pleasant surprises. 46. Refusing to use oils/whipped cream/other messy but fun things because you have 541510630 count Egyptian cotton sheets that were made by hand by the only person alive capable of sewing that pattern. They'll wash. 47. Doing all of your before bed things before sex. Yes, sleeping with makeup on is bad. Now is not the time to remove it, you can do that later. And really fucking you with your hair in a ratty scrunchie with acne cream on your nose is not all its cracked up to be. 48. Cleaning up after sex. Wiping the splooge off is one thing. But changing the sheets immediately so you can get the other ones in the washer and then sanitizing everything your naked body might have possibly passed by is not the way to do it. 49. Making a big deal out of it if he loses his hard on. This is not an interrogation, or 20 questions. It happens, he's probably mortified and you are NOT helping. Refrain from using phrases like "it happens to every guy". Just move to other activities until it gets hard again, and if it doesn't, get off another way with him. He's still capable of getting you off. Mumbling "Forget it" and rolling over are not ok. 50. Asking questions right afterwards. The woman equivalent of "was it good for you?". Now is not a good time to ask "What this means". Right now, it means he probably needs to take a drink, a leak and a nap, perhaps not in that order. Y'all need to be just as attentive back......which obviously u have not been. How many of y'all noticed #41 is missing?????? SEE? It's NOT all a woman's fault!!!!! Please leave a comment Thanxs! :)
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