Friends? Friends. What is a friend? I used to think that a friend was a person, not related to you, that you could count on to be there for you. Someone that is respectful and courteous to your feelings. Someone that understands you, is there when you cried, shares in your happiness and, in turn, shares his/her happiness with you and cries upon your shoulder. I have even had a few friends, here and there, that I thought would show up at my hospital bed if I were sick or injured and, possibly, a few more that would come to my funeral if I died. Until recently, I had even managed to keep in touch with a few from my high school days.
But over the past several months, some of my 'friends' have been drifting. Well....maybe drifting isn't the word. More like...slapping me in the face and stabbing me in the back. I've even had a couple of them rip out my heart, crush it into throbbing pulpy mass of quivering tissue, throw it on the ground under the tire of their black Dodge Durango, jump in the driver's seat and proceed to spin the tires until it comes shooting back out at me in a splattery mess of...well, you get the picture.
But you....you take the cake. Not only have you done all of the above, but now you want to blame me for the way things have turned out? You want to act like I'm the one that was pushing for more than friendship?!?! Now I ask you to really think about that for a second. Who was the one that kept implying that he wanted to do more than just hang out? Who was the one that wanted me to come help him get over his illness in the bedroom? Who was the one that blatantly told me where he wanted to stick it???????
Was that all a joke? Were you just kidding every time? Even when I tried to say "Hey, lets just be friends since it's obvious you aren't that into me." What was your response??? Lets see if I can remember it correctly....oh right...it was something along the lines of "I never said that. I just need some time for the emotional, but the physical..."
Even after I begged you not to play around or get my hopes up, you did anyway. WTF?????? What is wrong with you???? Why would you play with someone's emotions like that? And now...because you're fucking my ex-best friend (who is married, has 3 kids, and several boyfriends and is only using you as a way out) now, you wanna act like I don't have a right to be upset??? Like I'm playing some stupid, jealous role? You damn well know better than that. I have never had issues with jealously...ever. What makes you think you're so special???? I have every right to be upset, you both fucked me over and you continue to do so every time you try to act like you want to be my 'friend'. Why? Why even bother? Is it because you need me around for your amusement? Do you get off on torturing me or making fun of my weight? Taking advantage of the fact that I can't say no to you? Do you like it when I cry? I bet you do…I could so hit you below the belt right now. But I won’t, because I’m not that cruel…even when you so richly deserve it.
*Scoff*....Friend....More like ANTI-friend.
