Jess TAKEN's blog: "My Obituary"

I close my eyes and smile whenever I miss you because I know you're also smiling and missing me too. I can still see your eyes, staring back at me, and I can still hear your heart beating ever-so-softly. Even when Im alone and when you're not there, you have my heart and hold it so please do take care. If you ears really do ring, then the saying is true. They should always ring because I am ALWAYS thinking about you.

Clouds streak the sky, the sun brightens the day, so many promises broken, as my hopes fade away. Remembering painful memories, that stay in me head, the less painful ones, I think of instead. Blood stains my skin, fear floods my mind, and it seems that darkness is all Im starting to find. I am over come by pain, as it over takes my soul, the silence is so loud, as I go deeper into this endless hole.

Drugs feel so good, well this is my farewell fix, how could you leave me. at a time like this? so many promises broken, you said you'd never leave and yet now you're gone you walked away from me. Baby, I love you, but FUCK YOU, if thats how you're gonna be. Just get up and go, but stay out of my life, you cant just keep pushing harder and harder on that knife. Come back and leave come back again but there is NO WAY IN HELL THAT YOU'LL EVER GET BACK IN! Love is just a four letter word nothing more, and a whole lot less, i thought I was broken but its you whos the mess. Tear apart my world, turn everything upside down, the kind of shit here's your fucking crown.

Nothing matters for life is gone, the facts of life were all but wrong. Pieces fall from the skies above, how could god kill everything he 'loves'? Disease and heartache, torture and pain, if we live to die, then we're here in vain. Clouds can fall and the sun will rot, we're killing ourselves but will we ever stop? Raising children in a world of war, what's different that wasnt there before? Fighting and hate, a world of shame, maybe its time for that world ending rain. Everywhere eyes can see, and everywhere they wont, in everything hands can touch, and everything they dont, there are plots of corruption that lips wont speak, world domination that everyone seems to seek. Two different kinds in this world today, ones who pretend to care and ones who waste away. those that lay around just waiting to die, and those who lay under the falling sky.

A girl across the street, sits in the corner, cries, depression sets in, she's empty inside. Never leaves the dark, lights are always off, can't subdue the feeling, it just wont stop. The blinds are drawn, you can't see in, the lies there waiting, for her pain to begin. It will not come, this painful state, for this is her torture, everlasting wait.

This picture of happiness lies scattered on the floor smiling faces ripped in half are now cheerful no more. Pieces absorb the pain that accumulates around like a sponge in the water or like water in the ground. These images once optimistic and full of so much trust now fear being framed even fear being touched. The eyes in these illustrations once vibrand and bright now vacant and deceased as if they would hold no sight. This perfect picture of happiness has been frayed and shredded and torn, transformed into the purest of pain torn smiles faded, cursed, and forlorn.

Restless in her bed at night she lay at her hands stood her fate with her heart a game it played. The future became unsure what shall lie ahead? Only time can tell unless she gives up instead. Her hearts only ailment is that it breaks in her chest knowing the pain love can cause and wondering 'what could be next?' Scars lie on her flesh stories that only she can tell each one with its own tale descriptions of her own personal hell. so many have caused her pain fears and secrets that nobody knows she keeps it all deep down inside letting it all fester, letting it grow. Pain had become her one true friend for in heart she always knew that it would see her to the end.