The Hellmime's blog: "My 2 Cents"

Okay, check this out. Halo 2 is finally out on PC, but guess what... That's right folks, the wonderful people at Microsoft have decided that Windows XP users will have to upgrade to Vista for around 300 bucks before they can play. THe question is... Why? THere are dozens of games out there for PC with much greater graphic quality than Halo 2 that are fully capable of running on XP and do. So why is Halo trying to make us shell out even MORE money? What if we're happy with XP and we don't like Vista, or have experienced enough problems with Vista to want to stick with XP at least until all the bugs are worked out? I don't know about you, but I'm not too fond of the idea of shelling out 300 bucks for a plastic disc and some readin' material to begin with. Much less being forced to (if I want this game that badly) buy an Operating System I don't even like.... I've seen Vista at work and I must say it's shit. PEripherals don't work, A creative webcam install disc made the computer not recognize the CD-Rom drive without having to do a full GAteway Restore, Printers weren't compatible. I dunno about most of you gamers, but I play Halo PC with a Joystick in my left hand and the mouse in the other, and I've gotten used to it. Unfortunately, my controller wasn't recognized by Vista at all. SO there are some folks who are pleading to get this game set up for Legitimate XP gameplay by Bungie and MIcrosoft and they've set up a petition. It's got a little over 6,300 votes by now and I've already signed it in the hopes that it will do some good. PRoblem is, I don't think the petition has been advertised anywhere. I stumbled upon it quite by accident while trying to find a copy of Halo 2 for PC by searchign google. Now, I implore anyone who is a fan of Halo, or at least someone who likes pc games, to sign the petition themselves and even pass along the word, share the link with others, and hopefully get a good game ported to a decent (And highly capable) Operating System. http://www.petitiononline.com/H2XP2000/

THis is a question I've often asked myself. I guess, to start off with.. I want a place to call my own. Sure, I have an apartment, but I have to deal with nosy, annoying neighbors... I want to build a house somewhere on a hill near a river..maybe in Scottland somewhere.. I want a car...but I think it's ridiculous to have to pay more money for something I already own (Namely the car insurance.) I want to own my own business. I'm an artist. Most Artists aspire to this.. I'm just...I'm a floater. I get by on a commission or two here and there... But I'm probably gonna be a floater for some time...I don't have the motivation required to get what I want. Sure, money to get the things I want should be the motivation...but I hate money...but I have to have it to survive..and that sucks. I'm an idealist, I guess..believing that everyone should have what they need in life without having to struggle to achieve it. BUt, then again, there are those who say that life is nothing but one big struggle... I'm tired of struggling to reach the pinnacle.. I'm just one person, after all, in this big world. I'm no Bill Gates or Stephen King, I'm no Rembrandt or Picasso...I'm just plain ol' ordinary William Luke. I have some skills when it comes to drawing..but I started out drawing when I was a little kid..I got seriously into it when I was 15...and now I've started losing interest in the only thing I'm good at... Do you have any idea what it's like to no longer have the drive to do what it is you are naturally good at? It's the only skill I've ever built upon and now I'm losing interest in it... I have no other skills unless you count flipping burgers..and who the fuck wants to do THAT for the rest of their lives? I know I'm capable of so much more than what I've become. I just dunno if I have what it takes to fight the past and bury it. My past is a big part of my life...I deal with it every day...I have nightmares about it.. I try to put it behind me..but the tumultuous thread of thoughts in my head always leads me back to the past...I could be thinking of something totally unrelated, like, I dunno, an airplane...and I begin thinking of the life I could have had, had my mother decided to stay with the one guy I thought was capable of being a good father (Whom happened to work at an industrial Airpark). It is then that I slip into a depression that I find it hard to get out of...Like a deep pit with no hand or footholds, no ladder..and I can't dig my way out... I'm a jumbled mess of emotions. I distance myself from the people who are trying to help me and for the life of me I can't figure out why... Do I want to be alone? Am I searching too hard for answers? What will it take to get me out of this slump I'm in? Hard work and dedication... BUt I'm apprehensive...what if I fail again? Can I handle having to build myself back up? And if I can...what if I fall again? What then? Will I have the strength to pick myself up off the floor and keep going? I've often thought of suicide..but I know it would be a life wasted and soon forgotten.. And that's my greatest fear in life. I don't want to be forgotten. I don't want to live my life in obscurity...I want more.. I know I do... I'm just too scared to go after it...

Well..It seems that I missed the deadline for the free ozzfest tickets for the concerts closest to me. I've never been to a real concert before. Sure, I've been to Mayfest and the like..but those aren't concerts..those are small gigs that maybe a couple thousand go to at most, and that's not all in one day. I wanna experience not being able to hear my friend talking to me over all the cheering and yelling and carrying on. I wana experience getting drunk and screaming at the band for more music. I wanna catch the pic of an awesome, well-known guitar player, or have Ozzy look me in the eye, even for a split second. I want to know what it's like to be ina REAL mosh pit. not one of those stupid little wannabe mosh pits where there are, like, 5 people pushing and shoving one another. Tiny cramped rooms full of noise and people too disinterested in the music and more into socializing are not my thing. I wanna experience the sensation of my teeth chattering in my head from the sound of the Amplifiers. I want my head to swim and I want the haze of inaudibility after a heavy concert. I want my TEETH to go NUMB from the sound of a crying guitar. I want to have to yell at my friendsw when talking to them on the ride home cause I'm deaf from the thrumof the music. I want to know what it's like to be at a real rockin' fucking concert. But it looks like I missed the opportunity to go and be one of the hundreds of thousands who are gonna see this thing. It's gonna be damn near as big as Woodstock and I'm gonna miss the whole fuckin' shebang... Sucks to be me, I guess.