LewAngel's blog: "Meh.. Who REALLY cares?"

Those who know me, know me well. You know I am all for helping people. Anywho... I went into the Fu Help Lounge. One Bouncer was having connection trouble. No her fault. Anither went out for a smoke. As a smoker, can't blame them either. BUT........ I am a helpful person. I Love to help people when I can. So me being well... ME, I tried to help those in the lounge...... Next thing I know. My messages are deleted. Why? Here's why.... In order....... Hmmm.... I didn't know there was a law about who can can an cannot help. I didn't know I had to have an ORANGE name to give help to others..... Fuckers....

How the hell did THIS happen and what exactly does it mean???? Today's Rank: #37

Does anyone else have an obsession with bubble wrap?? I do. I've loved it since I was a kid. There is just something satisfyin about popping all of the bubbles.. one... by... one! I got a whole box of it yesterday! POP!! :P

This is just my random rambleings... Have any of you felt so utterly alone even though you have people around you? Have you ever yearned for what is not there? Have you ever dreamed you could just sleep and never wake up? I do.... I don't show it and only a few, do I allow close enough to see. I try to be strong for those I mentor. But even a mentor has weaknesses. Sometimes I feel I am at my breaking point. I can only carry so much. I am only human...after all...

No longer will I run, no longer will I hide, I will never stop in my search for love. Gladly I would give of my self, my sanity, my pride, for the embrace of a passionate soul I've been so dreaming of. I will journey through the day, never to rest I wander the night, Looking, calling, dreaming and longing of when I can look into his eyes of light. To entwine our souls till eternity is at it's end, For this I would go to any extreme, even time I would learn to bend. But from my mistakes I must learn, from deep within my soul I had to reach inside. So no longer will I run, No longer will I hide.

I thought I knew. But I did not. My heart feels like it has been torn from my chest. Battered and bruised, broken at best. I offered myself to you, a piece of my heart. Now I realize, it was all for nawt. A friend you will be. A friend you'll remain. But my heart is now torn and it is I, who must deal with the pain.