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What is a True Friend?

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad. 2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. 3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in. 4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get. 5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining. 6. When you are confused -- I will use little words. 7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have. 8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass. 9. This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end 'Why?' you may ask; 'because you are my friend'. Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

Every Woman Should Know

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW how 2 fall in love w/out losing herself EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW how 2 quit a job break up w/a lover & confront a friend w/out ruining the friendship EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW when 2 try harder & when 2 walk away EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW that she cant change the length of her calves the width of her hips or the nature of her parents EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW that her childhood may not have been perfect but its over EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW what she would & wouldnt do for love or more EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW how 2 live alone even if she doesnt like it EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW whom she can trust whom she cant & why she shouldnt take it personally EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW where 2 go her best friends kitchen table or a charming inn in the woods when her soul needs soothing EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW what she can & cant accomplish in a day a month & a year

Loving and Being Loved

"LOVING AND BEING LOVED IS WHAT MAKES LIFE WORTH LIVING. LOVE CAN MELT THE HARDEST HEART, HEAL THE WOUNDS OF A BROKEN HEART, AND QUIET THE FEARS OF AN ANXIOUS HEART. IT IS A UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE EVERYONE UNDERSTANDS. YOU AND I NEED TO LEARN TO LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS INSTEAD OF LOVING THINGS AND USING PEOPLE TO GET THEM." -JOYCE MEYER
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