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Phoenix's blog: "life"

created on 09/15/2006  |  http://fubar.com/life/b2060

hey everyone

Yes i am still alive and breathing. I know i have not been around in awhile but i have been busy. That and dec. was really hard for me. I lost two of my friends ,my grandfather(dad is how i thought of him) and a kitten. March is going to be busier to becouse we are moving to Texas. Yay i get to go home. I can not wait then maybe i wont feel so bad. To top it off all i wanted to do was relax this year i guess that is not going to happen. To all my friends and family i am sorry i have not been around. I am just now coming off my bender from dec. So i am getting back to normal. I hope that is a good thing at lest for me.

lessons

why is it that people hurt each other why can't we all get along for thoose that have been hurt it sucks for thoose that do the hurting it will come back to u and thoose that walk this world watching others hurt why do u do that can you not see that walking around with ur eyes shut causes someone to have pain wake up stand up don't let other feel the pain i have felt so much it my life it is not fair all i want is joy just like everyone eleas it is time we make the world a better place everyone dry ur eyes and stand up for grace.

why

Why is it there is so munch drama around??? It is not like i don't need it. For my friends my grandfather is in the hospital. Plus the doc is saying the don't know if my mother will even be able to walk this time next year. We are going to court for custody of my soon to be step daughter. so why do stupid people like to cause drama in my life no clue. Though i know i am not putting up with it any longer. As for my hope of going into the millitry more then likely this time next year i will be in basic. weather i am a mom in my own right or not i am not giving up what i want for any reason. Yes i will love my child but if i give up on my dreams then what am i showing my child and my step daughter?? As for my friends if u jusr want to cause drama in my life u r not a friend. if u can't support me even though u do not agree with what i want i have no need for u. to thoose who have already told me don't go i am going get over it. to thoose who have called me crazy i maybe just a lil but i am going. for thoose who know me know i am detremened person with a heart of gold.for thoose just getting to me thank u for not judging me based on what others have said. yes i was the wild child now i want to do something with my life. It is mine to live no one can live it for me , and as of this min no one is going to tell me how to live it. As for my exes. most r still my friends but it is not like i go parting with them. my friends from childhood have growen up some i still talk to some i could careless about. though i no longer live in the past i live for the future my futre my family's futre. no matter what people say i have growen and become who i am today becouse of my past. Thank you to all who past through my life and helped shaped it. But Thank You to all who choose to stay for u are true friends. As for the ones i count as borthers and sissters thank you all for being there for me and allowing me to be there for you. As to the man i love he is a good person. Without him in my life not sure what i would have done.
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