nnocentAngei's blog: "Lemonade"

So life's been a little crazy recently. Work has been busy as we had Inventory to do. But life has been slowly moving towards one big event and slowly further from another. I left my Ex-Husband almost six months ago. Our Divorce will be finalized in a weeks time. I'm looking forward to having it said and done with. But there will be some challenges along the way.

His lawyer says I don't deserve Spousal Maintanance or as most people know it, Alimony. Prolem is I depended heavily on HIS income to serviv and now without it I'm barly making it month to month.

The good news that rolls into this month is I have known my boyfriend for a month and a half now. We get along great and I wouldn't trade him for the world. It was luck and chance that I met him and I don't intend to do anything to loose him.

So there we are. The current leamonade in my life is my new boyfriend and the people I live with - my ex-husbands Mom - life is moving steadily and surely just as it always days. Progressing one day at a time, one breath at a time. I couldn't be happier.

So life's gotten harder and easier at the same time. I'm currently getting a divorce. Some days I can't wait for it to be finalized and some days I don't want it at all. It's confusing at moment and other's it's not.

But I've been learning. Life game me lemonade. I don't have to work at it, I am learning to see it in everything. Since I left my husband I've found life easier on me, I've started to really find myself. I've got myself on medication I need, I'm going back to school. I'm doing all these things that I just hadn't really been able to push myself to do while married. But here I am finding myself working to make myself better. I just hope he can pull himself together then maybe, just maybe we can give it another try before all the papers are final. I really don't belive in divorce.

So I've been struggling recently. I can't seem to pull myself to exactly where I want to be. I've been finding things easier when I look at what's being given to me and not what I want and am not getting. But I still am finding it difficult. I'm trying to be a supportive wife to my husband but it's hard when he should be looking for a job and isn't even trying. I can't seem to make Lemonade out of the Lemons I have at the moment.