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What are you waiting for?
I sit here in my thoughts - all of the things I've done and said. I wonder what other ways of life that I could of chose, other ways of life I could of lead. The people who I've crushed, the ones who have broken my heart ... no matter how much inner bruising I'll always stay alarmed; assert - you have to be ready, eventually everything falls apart.
Always so confident and happy on the outside, but no one knows the half of what I hide in my mind - my soul. Sometimes I feel myself want to shatter, some of the time I just feel my heart grow so dark ... so fucking cold. Dismay seems to devour away at all the guilt and sorrow inside.
All of this hurt just won't seem to abide ...
Mayhem emotionally strikes my heart constantly, fuck it - I'll just drown all of it away. Maybe I can actually be someone, maybe one of these days ...
