bottombaby24's blog: "Its Hard being.........."

I love being gay. I do, really do. Ignorance is easier just don’t listen. Don’t listen to the names. I love being gay. Who else has a rainbow flag? My friend loves me more, for being gay. My mum loves me, if I were or not. I love being gay. I found who I am, and ask me if I would change. I won’t, because I am who I am, and you who you are. I love being gay. The word means happy, so why are we glum? I tell you ignorance is the key. It’ll set you free. Oh I can’t forget to say… I love being gay.

I can't live with the idea of you knowing how to exist without me. The morning dew settles from yesterday's mist, as my tears finally dry from a night of forever needing you. I remember when you had me chasing you. Making me run like a little boy after an ice cream truck on the hottest day in September. Your laugh echoes into the crook of my eardrums as you watch me experience the coolness of your smile. You can relieve the most painful memory and replace it with the bliss of your presence. Your hands carry me to the place where Gods go for their peace of mind and I find myself thinking, this is heaven for me. Your voice resonates to the beat of my heart like the humming of a singer shedding off her blues. Your whole being has me falling into a peaceful state of euphoria. But I sit here with my journal open because it is the only world I know how to tread on. I want my pen to help me escape the longing. I want to lose myself on these pages so that I can stop from missing you. Knowing deep down inside that I haven't learned how to let you go. If I did, then these words would not have been able to find themselves. Intertwined in the desire of trying to keep you. I need this poem to stop writing itself but my brain wants to continue in this agony I am living in. My soul wants to wrap around your heaven and illuminate the possibilities that could still exist if you stick by me.

somtomes i wish i could close my eyes and dream, but dreaming always gets in the way of reality, its hard beg me, but only me eyes can see my only dream is to be happy.... tears run down like waterfalls because guy treat me like shit, but hey i dream i cry, but where does that get me i have a heart of gold would u see it no, cause why cause u look at me as being gay but i don't care im me and i won't change me for nothing, late at night i dream but i wish my dreams where real cause all i want is to be happy.

it's so hard being me today not everyone likes me cause im gay i just wish others would understand how it feels to be me, somtimes i wish i could change me cause it would be so much easier, to be str8 ppl always fucking around with me and saying all i am good for is a good lay im tired of this shit i but its life. till next time