The IRS decides to audit Boudreaux, and
summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor is not
surprised when Boudreaux shows up with his attorney
Thibodeaux.
The auditor says, 'Well, sir, you have an
extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment,
which you explain by saying that you win money
gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable.'
'I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it,'
says Boudreaux. 'How about a demonstration?'
The auditor thinks for a moment and said, 'Okay.
Go ahead.'
Boudreaux says, 'I'll bet you a thousand
dollars that I can bite my own eye.' The auditor
thinks a moment and says, 'No way! It's a bet.'
Boudreaux removes his glass eye and bites it.
The auditor's jaw drops. Boudreaux says, 'Now, I'll
bet you two thousand dollars that I can
bite my other eye.'
The auditor can tell Boudreaux isn't blind, so he
Takes the bet.
Boudreaux removes his dentures and bites his good
eye.
The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered
and lost three grand, with Boudreaux's attorney as a
witness. He starts to get nervous.
'Want to go double or nothing?' Boudreaux asks. 'I'll
bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one
side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on
the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in
between.'
The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he
looks carefully and decides there's no way this guy
can manage that stunt, so he agrees again.
Boudreaux stands beside the desk and unzips
his pants, but, although he strains mightily, he can't
make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other
side, so he pretty much urinates all over the desk.
The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has
just turned a major loss into a huge win. But
Boudreaux's attorney moans and puts his head in
his hands.
'Are you okay?' the auditor asks. 'Not really,' says
the attorney. 'This morning, when Boudreaux told me
he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty
thousand dollars that he could come in here and piss
all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it.'
Take Care of Yourself and Someone else
Ride Safe, Ride Like You Stole It and
Ride Like You Gotta Pee