hnrblbrbrn's blog: "Honorable Barbarian's Mindless Thoughts"

Gone for a few days with reserves training. A little training so I can go up for advancement. Great way to seque into a new job on days after working nights.

Next Monday I start my new job. I'll be a field service rep. Out of the cubicle.

Nothing original from me but a joke a buddy sent Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Cokie Roberts, and a tough old U.S. Marine Sargent were all captured by terrorists in Iraq . The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded. Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowlful of hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content." Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O Canada" one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied the Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag Musicians and played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could now die peacefully. Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end." The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy." The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final wish?" "Kick me in the ass," said the Marine. "What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?" "No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in t he ass," insisted the Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the ass. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4 carbine and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire. In a flash, all the Iraqis were either dead or fleeing for their lives. As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings , and Roberts, they asked him, "Why didn't you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass first?" "What," replied the Marine, "and have you three Assholes report that I was the aggressor?

Again I'm just ripping off the news, but if any of those billionaires want to become an evil genius and take over the world... Bill Gates not included, he can just buy the world as is The Principality of Sealand, a self-proclaimed mini-state located on a World War II-era fort off the coast of England, is up for sale as a "country." The Independent reported Tuesday that the turnkey "country" comes with its own passports, currency and stamps and is available for $126 million. Sealand, much like an oil platform, is located some 7 miles off Harwich, a busy coastal town and international port located in northeast Essex. The area has a rich history. The Independent reports that Sealand became an independent state after "Prince" Roy Bates set up a homestead with his family in 1967. However, the story goes that the Royal Navy was sent to get him off the property but the feisty Bates met them with warning shots and the government decided not to press the matter. A judge later ruled that Sealand was outside Britain's 3-mile limit and thus not subject to British jurisdiction. The micro-nation is listed with the Spanish real estate firm Inmonaranja. No word on any scheduled open houses.

Yet another ripped out of my mail Man, I'm a lazy SOB But I still think it's funny 5 Digit Disco Buzzing the honey hole Backslappin' Betty Bailing out the Gravy Boat Beaver bashin' Bouncing the bearded clam Buffing the box Buffing the jewel Buttering up the whisker biscuit Clam twiddlin' jamboree Critter crammin' Damming the beaver Dialing "O" on the little pink telephone Diddling miss daisy Diggin' for clams Digitis Erectus Fingering the fountain Flicking the minnow Friday night lip service Frosting the muffin of love Giving yourself the finger Going for the gooey duct Impeaching Bush Juicing the clam Let your fingers do the walking Lip smacking Petting the kitty Piddly Diddler Playing the squeezebox Pokin' the pie Polishing the little pink pearl Pumping the kooter Punchin' the chipmunk Reading in Braille Riding the clitorisauras Romancing thy own Roughing up the suspect Self-guided tuna boat tour Smacking Jerry Garcia on the nose Spanking Lucy Stroking the newt Ticklin' the taco Tissue tickling Twirling the pearl Unbuttoning the fur coat Warming the wrist rocket

yeah I know 2nd blog with nothing original 25. Glenn Close: Mother Simpson 24. Aerosmith: Themselves 23. The Hullapalooza Performers: Peter Frampton, Smashing Pumpkins, Cypress Hill and Sonic Youth as themselves 22. Tito Puente: Himself 21. James Taylor: Himself 20. The Cast of Cheers: Sam Malone, Woody, Carla, Cliff, Norm 19. Mel Gibson: Himself 18. Spinal Tap: David St. Hubbins, Nigel Tufnel, Derek Smalls 17. The Pro Baseball Players in "Homer at the Bat": Roger Clemens, Wade Boggs, Ken Griffey Jr., Steve Sax, Ozzie Smith, José Canseco, Don Mattingly, Darryl Strawberry, Mike Scioscia and Terry Cashman as themselves. 16. Stephen Hawking: Himself 15. The Ramones: Themselves 14. Johnny Cash: Coyote 13. Elizabeth Taylor: Maggie Simpson 12. Ron Howard: Himself 11. Leonard Nimoy: Himself 10. The Beatles: Ringo Starr, George Harrison, and Paul McCartney as themselves 9. John Waters: John 8. Jon Lovitz: Artie Ziff, Mr. Seckofsky, Professor Lombardo, Aristotle Amadopoulis, Llewellyn Sinclair, Ms. Sinclair, Jay Sherman 7. James Earl Jones: Narrator, Maggie Simpson, Moving Man, Serak the Preparer 6. Winona Ryder: Alison Taylor Lisa's 6th grade rival 5. Michael Jackson: Michael 4. The Krusty Comeback Performers: Bette Midler, Hugh Hefner, Johnny Carson, Luke Perry and the Red Hot Chili Peppers as themselves 3. Dustin Hoffman: Mr. Bergstrom 2. Mark Hamill: Himself and Leavalle 1. Albert Brooks: Cowboy Bob, Jacques, Brad Goodman, Hank Scorpio, Tab Spangler

lifted from my mail, I know not very original but gotta start somewhere 1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE". 2. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Belair "...and can do the "Carlton". 3. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own. 4. "WOAH " comes from Joey on Blossom. 5. Two words: Hammer Pants. 6. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock ". 7. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales ". 8. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles " on the big screen... and still know the turtles names. 9. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school. 10. L.A. Gear... need I say more. 11. You wanted to be a Goonie. 12. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf. 13. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets. 14. You still get the urge to say "NOT " after every sentence. 15. You ever owned a pair of Jelly-Shoes. 16. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know you are, but what am I?" 17. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up" 18. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide. 19. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies. 20. You remember watching "Rainbow Bright" & "My Little Pony" 21. You thought Doogie Howser/Samantha Micelli was hot. 22. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac. 23. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool... and don't even flinch when people refer to them as "NKOTB". 24. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell ", the ORIGINAL class. 25. You used to (and probably still do) say "What you talkin' about Willis?"