SallyJack 2020's blog: "Poetry"

I didn't want to let you into my heart, but somehow you snaked your way in. now like a bolt of lightening you are gone.

You claim that I wasn't trying as hard, but I was you just couldn't see.

The hell and the torture I went through because I wanted to be with you, you will never know. Now you have a new woman, a new life, and I honestly hope that you are happy because that is all I have ever wanted for you.

At least you don't have to deal with my hurt, with my pain, knowing that yet another has stomped where no one should ever stomp.

You claimed that you would never hurt me, never let me down. But you did, you changed and not for the better.

You promised me the world and on a silver platter, I believed you, my heart told me I had to, but my head told me not to. I should have listened to my head because at least then I wouldn't be where I am today.

I might actually be happy and be with someone that wanted to be with me.

You say you are sorry, but I know that you are not. You arent the one that cant sleep, cant breathe, cant even close their eyes without seeing your face. You arent the one that is afraid to go to sleep, afraid that she will dream memories of you. Afraid that she will dream a happy memory and not want to wake up.

I know that there are more people out there for me to meet, and I know that in time I will meet someone that does have the capability to love honestly. To hold me in their heart and arms and never let me go. To give themselves to me completely without any thought of another.

But when I lost you not only did I lose a piece of my heart, I lost my best friend. Someone I thought that I could turn to in times when it is most needed. Someone that would always be there for me in good times and in bad. Someone that would hold me up and tell me I could get through it, I could get through anything. And I believe that is what hurts most of all, the biggest piece of me that is dying.

You were there for me when things went from bad to worse. You were there for me when things went from good to better.

You were there for me when I needed you, when I just needed someone to talk to.

But now you are not, why did you have to leave again?

that's twice that you have left me stopped talking to me, and stomped on my heart. You will never know pain like I have known pain, never know what its like to be a woman and know that she shouldn't, but trust so honestly so completely just to have her first instinct proven right.

Does she really mean that much to you that you had to destroy a friendship? That you had to destroy this woman's heart?

Destroy any trust that I had in the male species?

I used to think that I could love with all my heart and soul, and I thought I had, but wow.

Now that my faith in men, boys, and the entire male population of the earth is destroyed I only have one thing left to say………..

GOODBYE!