This is a bit of a re-write from a blog I posted last night, so apologies Bwhere...I deleted it because I didn't want to perpetuate negativity.
But apparently others do...so let's try and be a lil constructive here.
First off - by running someone off a website, what are you accomplishing?
Punishing him? That's what a legal system is for.
Making him feel bad? He'd have to have a conscience.
A moral stance? Well, I'll come back to that one.
Basically, to me, it's the 'out of sight out of mind' mentality at work - he's not a risk to any children on an adult website...so it doesn't actually matter if it makes you uncomfortable...you have to be a grown up and just suck some things up. I don't like a lot of things (sexual offenders included) but guess what? THEY'RE AMONGST US.
So, you're giving him more attention than he has probably EVER HAD - and as we all know, it doesn't matter if it's bad attention, ANY attention is good for the fucked up. And you're wanting to add stress to a sexual offender's life, further isolate him, make him a martyr, feel like a victim and then you want him to log the fuck off out of your sight.
Nobody has yet answered me how they feel about what's going to happen after he logs off. Nobody seems to care to think about the heightened risk which they have placed any children in his life in. It's similar to the calls for 'just leave the bastard' in a domestic violence situation. Guess when the woman is most likely to be killed by an abusive spouse? That's right, when the restraining order goes on or the spouse tries to leave.
So you answer me that, and I may just have an ounce of respect for you - for your balls if not your brains.
Now, let's go back to that moral stance shall we?
Here's a really basic list of what puts a child at risk of being abused:
Isolation and neglect - parents who are inattentive, unavailable, have chosen to escape through alcohol, drugs, affairs or just the damn internet, so they are susceptible to the attention of others.
Poverty or deprivation - parents who don't provide for their children, so they are susceptible to gifts from others.
Lack of role models (particularly the father) - parents who don't give their children attention, reinforcement, positive guides and good relationships to follow and model.
Lack of protection - parents who bring strangers into their homes and beds, who place their children in vulnerable situations because they think all the paedos are 'over there'.
Now I could name fubarians for each and every one of the above...but I couldn't name the people that have commented negatively...go figure.
Just as not many people gave a fuck about QUIETLY reporting abusive images to the authorities so that those children might have some chance...not many give a fuck about QUIETLY cleaning up the mess after an abuser's abused.
Now a paedophile (cuz you all know what a paedophile really is, don't you?) - they're more likely to randomly attack/kidnap/abuse...so that's where physical security becomes a part of the equation...but that's a really small proportion of sexual abuse cases. Really small.
(Side note: something else that pisses me off - saying young girls in beauty pageants is encouraging paedophilia. Newsflash - paedophiles like CHILDREN - a child made up and dressed up is going to be offputting...of all the things wrong with beauty pageants, that ain't one of them - yes I know your tv told you different, big fucking deal).
So the best you can do, as a parent, or an interested, caring adult, in the world...is to look after your children well.
I've often said, my parents could never protect me fully from life (none can) but by God I'm grateful for the skills they taught me to cope and thrive.
Back to the witch hunt...like I said, I fail to see the purpose. In some cases, I respect the need. And I do understand the hatred and the anger.
What I fail to understand is the stupidity. The minimisation of the pain of children and adult survivors of sexual abuse. The lack of basic knowledge and the complete fucking hypocrisy.
I don't care who you are, I don't care how long you've been on fu, what colour your name is, who your friends are or what your trauma is which supposedly justifies your behaviour - if you can't answer my fucking question, don't expect me to shut the fuck up.
Abuse of children is not fixed by witch hunts. It's not fixed by chemical castration or even killing the offender...the majority is fixed by parents being good parents...so would someone please concentrate on that?
Also of note - "if you're not with us, you're against us" is what got the world into a war (yes, the world IS involved)...it's the mentality of the mob, and I fucking hate it.
Oh and since when do people of any substance allow one attention-seeking twat to dictate terms for 'shaping up' and everybody else has to accept them? I 'attack' people of my choosing, with or without the say-so of someone who has more issues than most of the people he writes about. I didn't think my friends were such a bunch of unctuous followers.
Go on, tell me I'm on his side, or that I don't understand, or that you're doing it for the children,
I fucking dare you.
Warning: This is probably going to make me seem ungrateful and/or offend you in some way. You're just going to have to pretend to yourself for a moment that I might not give a fuck.
Now I'm used to being misunderstood...and misinterpreted. Particularly, it seems, on here. But one thing I'm usually pretty good at is being understood when I say things like 'fuck off'.
In my little life, people around me - regardless of how stupid they are - seem to get the fact that when I say fuck off, I mean...radically...fuck off. I mean step the fuck away, or you might just catch hell that you don't actually deserve. Leave me the fuck alone because the last vestige of my conscience is trying to save you from that, and me from having to bite through my tongue NOT to go you.
Not on here. Here, fuck off apparently means:
- I'm looking for attention
- I'm upset with someone in particular about something in particular and people should ask me if it's them or what they did
- I'm upset with someone in particular about something in particular and people should assume they know what and who it is and send me empathetic messages about it, which just kinda show they're self-centred hypocritical twats
- I'll be cheered up just as soon as someone rates all my pics (for the record, this is akin to giving me flowers as a sorry for fucking my mother...for those of you still wondering, NO it's not going to work) (no I don't mean you Joey, like I said, that was timing)
- I'm just waiting for you, yes you and only you, to say or do just the right cheery thing and all will be right with my world (that's a generic you before you get your knickers in a twist)
I realise I'm foreign. I realise that I'm apparently going to be judged against the proclivities of the masses, but can you please just take my word for it that when I say fuck off, I mean just fuck off? I mean leave me the fuck alone for just a bit?
The thing is...I get over shit pretty quickly - it takes a LITTLE longer when I have to shut down all my folders, walk away from the computer and stitch back my tongue because every single fucking person has decided they know what's going on and what's better for me than I do myself.
And yes, I know most people are well-intentioned, and I love you for it. Some, not so much, but I neither like you nor care what you do anyway.
And yes, I've made this 'no comment' because I'm not looking for attention, I'm simply looking to explain. Shit happens. I do not wish to take it out on the innocent. I get over it. It really is that easy.
I say what I mean...there is no double or hidden meaning for you to look for. I wish people would understand that; it's really depressing not being understood at that fundamental level.
Hearts, smiles and cute fluffy ducklings.