Kenner's Poetry

Redemption is for the Lucky

2013-05-22T19:19:15-07:00

I want to know why I'm here.

I so very desperately fear

that there is no reason.

Endless procession of time so very meaningless.

Just another day in the life of a creature staring at a bunch of nothing.

The nothing that we all become.

If there is something out there why does it not answer?

I feel so very alone. �Lost in a dream.

�

I can't seem to wake up anymore. �Just one blurry thought after another I can barely stand it.

I can see all the problems but I'm powerless to fix it.

Greed, malice, indifference, apathy, consumption, lethargy, numbness.

Small islands of happiness between them all.

They grow smaller by the year. �I can no longer see when the next one is coming. �It makes me want to quit swimming.

It feels like I'm writing into a faceless window.

I'm not even sure there is a reality on the other side of it anymore. �I can just see my fingers drumming instinctively recording my every thought.

It's mesmerizing in a way. �I don't even have to think about the movements. �It seems to be the way life is.

Autonomous. �

Perhaps dying is just falling away from reality. �The phrase "dead to the world" had it right.

Though the world is in all our eyes. �It's not an actuality.

I felt so tiny thinking about the vastness of the universe, but it's inconsequencial. �I'll never see them so they matter not to me truly.

I almost had myself convinced I believed.

That I believed we could make it into the stars or that the act of doing so meant anything at all.

I can only smirk at my ignorance. �The real trek is inside. �The one through the dark places in my mind.

The danger is giving up along the way and falling away forever.

Redemption is for the lucky.

We all stare at the demons everyday. �We see the tide of violence and corruption growing in the seats of power and we do nothing.

We wait for someone else to. �I fear we're all thinking the same thing.

We also consider that our own military would never harm us...

So very wrong. �When in history has the military of a nation not followed orders to exact vengeance on it's own and turned away?

Humans are violent and uncaring. �Lambs to the slaughter. �The funny thing... they'll believe like everyone else that it's for the greater good.

To unify the like minded of this country. �Corruption is never obvious. �In all facets of life.

You become unhappy. �You begin to assign blame around you and justify all the wrong you do by the wrong done to you.

One begets the other that begets the other, and even knowing it won't save you from it.

I'm beginning to think the human race cannot be saved. �It's programmed to destroy itself, and unfortunately everything around it in the process.

The Truth

2013-05-22T18:59:00-07:00

Nobody will miss these.

The Door

2013-05-22T12:13:56-07:00

I might just be poor white trash

In the end like you i'll just be ash

For all that I'm not here's what I am

I'm a crock, I'm a fool... I am a sham.

Infinitely intelligent in all the ways that don't matter.

My body and heart can all but shatter.

Pierced and broken in life's dark alley.

Though, above me is the flag to rally.

All of those just like me.

Those who don't know what to be.

Work in a cubicle everyday.

Wish and pray for another way.

Another way to live this life.

Another way to eat the strife.

Another way to see me clear.

Another way freed of doubt or fear.

Yea... Right.

Wish, want, pray and tremble.

Wait for life to give you a symbol.

Something to know it's time to get up.

Something to know to fill your cup.

Fill it with desire and pour it out.

Sit in the corner... whine and pout.

Is this the end? �I have no doubt.

This is it. It's here. Keep the pressure.

Keep pushing on for something fresher.

It's a game it always is.

Who's blame is it? Hers? �His?

It doesn't really matter now.

You can keep on asking how.

No answers from me forever more.

I'm tired. �I'm done. �I've shut the door.

Pointless

2013-05-20T09:35:34-07:00

The lion lays lazily staring...

At a mouse hole completely glaring.

As if he peered at the hole in a certain way...

The mouse would pop out sometime today.

He lays until he can't lay anymore.

He then slinks down to the cold floor.

The floor of his cave is littered with bones.

As he peers around he remembers the moans...

Of all the dying animals who'd been there before.

Before he dragged their bones back out the door.

Forgettig them all staring down the small hole

he pawed, scratched and dug like a mole.

Trying to squeeze his snout down inside

Thinking of eating it raw or maybe stir fried.

Nothing moved not even a twitch.

All he got was a lousy snout itch.

Tired and bored he laid down again.

Surprised near his stone he found a small friend.

The tiny mouse from the mouse hole...

Had snuck right passed while he dug like a mole.

He dug in the bones to confirm a lost friend...

and now spread his hands across as to mend.

As he failed the mouse looked back behind

and asked the lion where on earth did he find

his little love who had been far from home.

His only friend who loved to roam.

At first the lion did not wince or blink

and was on the mouse in but a wink.

He pawed him to floor and waited for plea.

The mouse made no sound and tried not to flee.

The lion surprised looked under his paw

To the mouse and in a little awe

The mouse stood still in between his claw

Even when the lion moved closer his maw

The mouse did not shiver or even look scared

Just continued to ask how in death his love fared

The lion said not well she struggled a bit

To this the little mouse threw quite a fit

It jumped up in air and darted to teeth

Opened the lion's jaw and slipped in beneath

The lion's tongue and therein he died

The bewilderment did not soon subside.

The lion laid in wonder over the little meal

He continued to wonder "What was his deal?"

The lion scoffed and wiped it's lips

Walking back to it's pile it shifted it's hips.

Quirking once more the thought was gone.

He now only wondered what he'd eat at dawn.

My Hero

2013-05-14T01:40:34-07:00

It occurred to me while feeling insignificant...of how I used to carry on a very lengthy rant.I looked in the mirror and peeled away the lies.I looked at myself with unadultered eyes.I tried to envision a very dirty, awful boy.One that did much wrong and treated girls like a toy.He abandoned those who had always had his back.He sent his life so horridly off track.Sitting in a puddle of self loathing misery.He couldn't look up to the light and see...that this world was not always simply black and white.I fitted myself with a brand new type of sight.The type of vision that let it be okay...All of the things I always had to say.Maybe that boy in the mirror isn't such a loss.Maybe his tarnished picture just needed a little gloss.
He wanted so to be so much more than he had been.He wanted just this time not to long to win.After all life just isn't all a game.If that's all it was this would all be so lame.Now that he is learning to stop and smell the roses...he had begun to ponder life and all the questions that it poses.What is it really in this world to be a hero anyways?Wearing underwear on your pants and coming up with a phrase?Maybe flying over buildings and punching fist through walls.Maybe it's being so superhuman that you have giant, nuclear balls.It isn't very likely that there are people much like that.There aren't any men who dress up like wolf or bat.A hero is a person who takes what they have to take.Maybe it's enough to have nothing and with that nothing make...The best out of everyday and everyone around.Maybe it's just listening without making a sound.Sitting beside the one's you love and holding fear at bay...running fingers through their hair and saying everything's okay.Even when it's not you keep your head up high...and taking that next step when you want to die.Carrying on for the ones that you'll always hold so dear...Tell them you'll always love them and you'll always be nearand wiping tears away and assuring that "There's nothing left to fear."Maybe with all that his conscience could feel clear...
It doesn't seem to matter what he thinks at end...What really matters is what they think.His family..His mate..His friend.
"I really love you Cuteness...�So much that I cannot sayall of the words any other way.I'm not sure what will come tomorrow.Maybe some more pain and a little sorrow.I hope you decide to stay by me all my little life...Though don't think I'd try to make you into my wife.I have to admit the thought has crossed my mind,but I know matrimony is the blind lead by the blind.Instead of pledging a stream of empty, shallow words...I'd just promise you to act like paired, love birds.We can fly away from here when we can't take it anymore...so long as you know that you're all I do this for.When your wings are broken I will carry you,and as long as I breathe I'll do anything for you.All you have to do is ask and it's yours so long as I have the power.As long as you promise me that in me dreadful hour...That you will still be there as I would with you,and just in case I leave ahead remember me in everything you do.Now that I've met you I can't picture life without,and though the rides been shakey I no longer have a doubt.You're the one for me, and it'll always be that way...and to all the rest around I have nothing left to say.You're the only one that I'll tell this to.From this night until death says I'm through."

No Name

2013-05-13T14:10:01-07:00

Just when I thought I'd had enough
Just when I thought I couldn't be tough
I redefine.
What does forever ever really mean?
Could I change it by being obscene?
Does tomorrow ever matter?
Does a heart ever fully shatter?
Likely not.
Battered and bruised and perfectly complete.
A window in time to all those you'll never meet.
It's about the nothing between the everything.
The moment when there is no meaning.
Just feeling growing and gleaning.
It's not enough just to taste.
There's no reason to make haste.
Slow down everything until you can pick apart the seconds.
Snatch up a memory and hold it until your hands are ash.
I am everything I always was,
Nothing more, but everything less.
Proud failure is rare, but nobody aims for the bottom with a head to the heavens.
Though you can fall facing up.
A finger or a wave?
Neither. �Just the infinite silence and eternal stares.
Are you real? �As real as I am at least.
I hope the dreamer wakes with a smile.
For everything I've done, was for the sake of amusement.
Those around me and those now gone.
What does the dreamer see when it looks at me?
A failure? �A jester? �A joke?
Perhaps, but again for the sake of amusement I give a bow.
Thanks for the chance to present.
Though curses forever for the stage.
It's not supportive, but it held me up in it's own way.
The way I'll now hold up the other.
The other me. �The one that matters now.

White Devil

2013-05-10T11:46:49-07:00

Once before I was a boy
For all the girls a little toy

Just another to annoy
and tell all your problems to

Nothing I can do
but keep on seeing through
to the you that you don't know

Pure and as white as the fallen snow

There is just one thing though

How does a demon have those wings?
How does it know how to do those things?
For all the corruption that it brings
Such a wonderful ride.

False Flag

2013-05-10T11:39:49-07:00

Your affections keep me sane
They keep all four tires in the lane
Otherwise I'd stray off course
Trade all fours tires for a horse
and ride it straight off a cliff.

Your drama keeps me playing
They keep my mouth from saying
That this world is none but shit
That kind of smog to take my hit
Then blow it in your face.

Your face is always true
It can't hide the things you do
But my face has another
It keeps it's other under cover
Until you see right through

Not a thing you can do.

Jaded and Faded

2013-05-09T20:10:18-07:00

Drowning in sorrow swimming in pain
Stopped for a minute to get out of the rain
Man when they say it pours theyre not fuckin' kiddin'
Seems like every little piece of happiness is fuckin' hidden
When I found her I was a little under the thumb
My body was twisted and my mind was numb
It took a rip of the heart to get me out of it all
Which was one good note before a huge fall
I had to break before I could fix all of me
I had to invent a me for the world to see
One side angry one side glad
One side empty One side mad
Inside there's darkness and on my face a smile
This story could go on for the longest mile
The real truth is I don't know me
What I see is what they want me to be
Not sure they're wrong or that I'm right
I just want some relief tonight
I pray once for some peace of mind
I pray twice for happiness to find
I pray thrice and then I'm done
Time to pick up into a full blown run
Get the fuck out and away from here
Though I have to admit my biggest fear
No matter where I go it'll find me waiting
Find me broken and to a dead world fading

Lose the Found

2013-05-08T03:46:18-07:00

Lost causes Lost causes I love them one and all.

The Found I hate until the moment they fall.

It's only when the found are lost that I can relent.

It's not until they're all like me that I am content.

It's not that I am better to this point I beg listen.

I just need them to see the bottom and everything they're missin'.

Because it's not what you have it's what you can do.

It's about standing up and attempting to always be true.

�

Someone took the reigns for you and guided horse to road.

Someone took a handful and helped bear the load.

You don't look at them like another kindred soul.

You just saw a footstep on the way along your goal.

It's not like you see them as if they're a person too.

�

Society wouldn't blame, "It's just something that they do."