How I feel

Silence

2012-12-08T14:38:33-08:00

Sitting here once again at a cross roads in my life. I am wondering so many things. I can't seem to get it right. I have made one decision tonight. I will no longer be walked on. I will no longer allow others to decide who I am as a person. I am stong, kind and unable to be anything but me. I am going to raise my son the best I can. He is a beautiful child who has a voice. He has a mind. I do not believe in a child being seen and not heard. I beleive in listening. If that makes me a messed up mom then so be it. I love my child and in my world he is all I need. During times of trouble I beleive God carries me. Tonight is one of those times. He will lead me down the path I am meant to be in. The crossraods will take me in a new direction. I am loved by my son and my family. Its all I need. My prayer tonight is that God leads me on. I give this to him. �Amen.

Bright Light

2012-08-11T03:03:34-07:00

Bright Light

Tonight I was lonely,
I had to come by,
I wanted to be happy,
In moments I would cry...
Just to say this to you,
I'll always be loving you...

I forget about the tears,
With your music in my ears,
I am really into you,
When I share with you,
Moments of your day,
What you have to say...
The little things you do,
Are those defining you.

No solitude in the night,
When I see your bright light,
My heart gets so happy,
I sense your serenity...
I'll just say this to you,
I'll be forever loving you...

Written for me by a dear old friend.

2011-10-27T19:45:06-07:00

Falling in love with you

I lived my life mostly in solitude,
Not because I was a bad dude,
Trust in people was not something to do,
Years before I knew you...
�
I walked through life going nowhere,
I saw trees but paradise was not there,
Birds flew around and I did not care too,
Long before I met you...
�
If sometimes I appear very sad,
Do not think I am feeling bad,
I care not for me but only about you,
I only care about you...
�
It was long for me to see some light,
Telling myself that all will be alright,
And you came to me like an angel in blue,
I finally had a gaze of you...
�
My life of lonelyness is now at an end,
When you came in my life I lived,
I've been falling in love with my angel in blue,
I am still falling in love with you...

�

by�Aim� Auger Jr.��

Time to say goodbye.

2011-06-27T14:11:30-07:00

Over the last years as a fu-addict, I have come to realize something? I can live with out fu. What kept me coming back was the friends I made. I lost some and others will forever remain in my thoughts and memories. I would like to thank so many for kindness shown to me. The sweet notes, pictures made for me and wonderful bling. You all at times went above a beyond to be sure I was OK. Now, that being said! I also need to make a statement. I am tired of only being able to level when it involves money. They advertise this as a free site. Sure! But? If you don't spend money here, you can call it a day. Girls don't care unless you but them things. Higher ups only give a damn about ability points and "let trade pimps, buzz kills and god modes!!!!!!!!!" I can't afford that stuff! These days I can't even pay my rent and don't even want to discuss my utilities. Have any of you stopped to realize you are paying for virtual shit? It has absolutely to real value! I miss cherry tap and fu when it first started. When people talked and rated! Seriously? Some have been on for years yet others come up so fast because they spend money. It a bunch of bullshit. Oh well, you fu's keep it real. Peace ~~Love and Fubar!

The meaning of Life

2011-03-04T18:52:05-08:00

"People talk about the meaning of life; there is no meaning of life--there are lots of meanings of different lives, and you must decide what you want your own to be." -- Joseph Campbell

A Freind

2011-03-04T18:50:25-08:00

I often wonder what is the defintion of a friend?�So many times in our lives people refer to us as friends! The problem is friends is a conditional term. They say you truely find out who your friends are when shit is really going wrong. I don't know if they do it out of true deep concern or obligation? What is my defintion of a friend? Fuck spelling today!

1) They never hurt you or make you feel so sick inside you can't function.

2) They have time for you and put you first when there truely is a need.

3) They truely want to know you. The whole you! Good and bad!

4) They do not put conditions on a friendship!!

5) They respect the fact when your feelings are deeper than theres and don't make you choose!

6) They lift you up and make you smile even though its hard sometimes to smile themselves.

7) They want to see you anytime and anywhere no matter who is there.

8) They do not leave you alone when you really need them and are scared.

9) They are the ones who are there when you are so emotionally down that you can't breath, (Thats when they breath for you!)

10) I just can't write anymore right now

Away

2011-03-04T18:49:05-08:00

When you go away,
On your trip around the world,
Don't forget to pack my heart with you.

It won't take much room,
Folded up and slipped between the pages of your guidebook,
Like some tattered piece of lace
Or dried out rose petal, saved for remembrance…

Be careful not to let it flutter to the ground
Lost in some distant, ancient erg…
Or be swept away by the wind
On some far off and grassy plain…

Instead, save it for a dark, and cold and lonely night
When your soul is weary
And you need to know
That somewhere, someone waits for you with longing..…

This is how I feel today. I continue to wait.

The fantasy verses reality

2011-03-04T18:47:28-08:00

The fantasy: Love's a river of
bliss.�The reality: Love is missteps, silences, and how-could-yous!
Contrary to popular opinion, this is okay.......

I think we need to relize that its not easy at all. People will give you all kinds of advice but, the reality is that its your decision. You need to think it through in your own mind. There is no right or wrong. I believe my heart will lead me to the right person

�

Strength

2011-03-04T18:44:56-08:00

The strength to rise from the pain,�
to continue at all cost,�
The strength to prolong all the shame,�
Knowing that you've lost,�
The strength to smile, when all you feel is anger,�
to substitute bad days, for the best ones you can remember,�
The strength to say 'I'm lost' when your pride has blocked your sight,�
to say 'please love me', though I've never done it right,�
The strength to say you love them, knowing there may be no reply,�
to stay by their sides at times, when all they do is cry,�
the strength to try again after many times of failing,�
to finally open up after many years of waiting,�
The strength to fall in love, though sacrificing your heart,�
to keep a loved one close while knowing you've grown apart,�
The strength to say ' I love you' when all else has gone wrong,�
to keep on waiting for you..... regardless of how long,

Just Be

2011-03-04T18:43:28-08:00

�

You can�travel�the world
But you can't run away
From the person you are in your heart
You can be who you want to be
Make us believe in you
Keep all your light in the dark
If you're searchin for truth
You must look in the mirror
And make sense of what you can see
Just be
Just be

They say learning to�love�yourself
Is the first step
That you take when you want to be real
Flying on planes to�exotic�locations
Won't teach you
How you really feel
Face up to the fact
That you are who you are
Nothing can change that belief
Just be
Just be

'cause now I know
It's not so far
To where I go
The hardest part
Is inside me
I need
To just be
Just be

Just be
Just be
Just be

I was lost
And I'm still lost
But I feel so much better

'cause now I know
It's not so far
To were I go
The hardest part
Is inside me
I need
To just be�
Just be

Lyrics Just Be Dj tiesto