tag:fubar.com,2010:blog-249224Mon, 22 Jun 2009 05:36:31 -0700A FEw Things To RememberA fubar user blog.
firstname.lastname@example.org (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)fubartag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-1036811Mon, 22 Jun 2009 05:36:31 -07002009-06-22T05:36:31-07:0090# on your phone<p>90# on your telephone I dialed '0', to check this out, asked the operator, who confirmed that this was correct so please pass it on . . . (l also checked out Snopes.com .. This is true, and also applies to cell phones!) PASS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW I received a telephone call last evening from an individual identifying himself as an AT&T Service Technician (could also be Telus) who was conducting a test on the telephone lines. He stated that to complete the test I should touch nine(9), zero(0), the pound sign (#), and then hang up. Luckily, I was suspicious and refused. Upon contacting the telephone company, I was informed that by pushing 90#, you give the requesting individual full access to your telephone line, which enables them to place long distance calls billed to your home phone number. I was further informed that this scam has been originating from many local jails/prisons DO NOT press 90# for ANYONE. The GTE Security Department requested that I share this information with EVERYONE I KNOW. After checking with Verizon they also said it was true, so do not dial 90# for anyone !!!!! PLEASE HIT THAT FORWARD BUTTON AND PASS THIS O N TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!</p>email@example.com (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)http://fubar.com/blog/249224/1036811#viewcomments
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-1036242Sat, 20 Jun 2009 17:35:32 -07002009-06-20T17:35:32-07:00Men's Age as Determined by a Trip to Wal-Mart.<p> Men's Age as Determined by a Trip to <span class="yshortcuts">Wal-Mart</span>. <br />> <br />> You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room, or whatever. You are hot and sweaty, covered in dirt or paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know the outfit - shorts with the hole in crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who knows what, and an old pair of tennis shoes. <br />> <br />> Right in the middle of this great home improvement project you realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help complete the job. <br />> <br />> Depending on your age you might do the following: <br />> <br />> In your 20's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout lane. And you went to school with the pretty girl running the register. <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 30's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl running the register is the kid sister to someone you went to school with. <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 40's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you don't want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The spicy young thing running the register is your daughter's age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy. <br />> <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 50's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don't want to get dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The Cutie running the register smiles when she sees you coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the hat you have on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got Worms .' <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 60's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the dog shit off your shoes. The mirror was shattered when you were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in your pants. The girl running the register may be cute, but you don't have your glasses on so you are not sure. <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 70's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they have your prescriptions ready, too. Don't even notice the dog shit on your shoes. The young thing at the register smiles at you because you remind her of her grandfather. <br />> <br />> <br />> <br />> In your 80's: <br />> <br />> Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now you remember you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and wander around trying to think what it is you are looking for. Fart out loud and you think someone called out your name. You went to school with the old lady who greeted you at the front door. </p>firstname.lastname@example.org (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)http://fubar.com/blog/249224/1036242#viewcomments
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-1014432Sat, 20 Jun 2009 17:24:43 -07002009-06-20T17:24:43-07:00A Black Woman<p>
</p><p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino;"><span style="font-size: large;"><em><span style="color: #ff0000;"><span style="text-decoration: underline;">The Black Woman</span></span></em></span></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"> </p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Black queen of beauty, thou hast given color to the world!<br />Among other women thou art royal and the fairest!<br />Like the brightest of jewels in the regal diadem,<br />Shin'st thou, Goddess of Africa, Nature's purest emblem!<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Black men worship at thy virginal shrine of truest love,<br />Because in thine eyes are virtue's steady and holy mark,<br />As we see in no other, clothed in silk or fine linen,<br />From ancient Venus, the Goddess, to mythical Helen.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>When Africa stood at the head of the elder nations,<br />The Gods used to travel from foreign lands to look at thee:<br />On couch of costly Eastern materials, all perfumed,<br />Reclined thee, as in thy path flow'rs were strewn-<br />sweetest that bloomed.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Thy transcendent marvelous beauty made the whole world mad,<br />Bringing Solomon to tears as he viewed thy comeliness;<br />Anthony and the elder Caesars wept at thy royal feet,<br />Preferring death than to leave thy presence, their foes to meet.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>You, in all ages, have attracted the adoring world,<br />And caused many a bloody banner to be unfurled:<br />You have sat upon exalted and lofty eminence,<br />To see a world fight in your ancient African defense.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Today you have been dethroned, through the weakness of your men,<br />While, in frenzy, those who of yore craved your smiles and your hand-<br />Those who were all monsters and could not with love approach you-<br />Have insulted your pride and now attack your good virtue.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Because of disunion you became mother of the world,<br />Giving tinge of robust color to five continents,<br />Making a greater world of millions of colored races,<br />Whose claim to beauty is reflected through our black faces.<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>From the handsome Indian to European brunette,<br />There is a claim for that credit of their sunny beauty<br />That no one can e'er to take from thee, 0 Queen of all<br />women<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Who have borne trials and troubles and racial burden.<br />Once more we shall, in Africa, fight and conquer for you,<br />Restoring the pearly crown that proud Queen Sheba did wear:<br />Yea, it may mean blood, it may mean death; but still we shall fight,<br /> </em></span></strong></p>
<p align="center"><strong><span style="font-family: georgia, palatino; color: #ff0000; font-size: large;"><em>Bearing our banners to Vict'ry, men of Afric's might.<br />Superior Angels look like you in Heaven above,<br />For thou art fairest, queen of the seasons, queen of our love:<br />No condition shall make us ever in life desert thee,<br />Sweet Goddess of the ever green land and placid blue sea.</em></span></strong></p>
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-981221Sat, 28 Feb 2009 15:58:57 -08002009-02-28T15:58:57-08:00GPS and CELL PHONES
This gives us something to think about with all our new electronic
A couple of weeks ago a friend told me that someone she knew had their
car broken into while they were at a football match.
Their car was parked on the green which was adjacent to the football
stadium and specially allotted to football fans. Things stolen from the
car included a garage door remote control, some money and a GPS which
had been prominently mounted on the dashboard.
When the victims got home, they found that their house had been
ransacked and just about everything worth anything had been stolen.
The thieves had used the GPS to guide them to the house. They then used
the garage remote control to open the garage door and gain entry to the
house. The thieves knew the owners were at the football game, they knew
what time the game was scheduled to finish and so they knew how much
time they had to clean up the house. It would appear that they had
brought a truck to empty the house of its contents.
I never thought of this......
This lady has now changed her habit of how she lists her names on her
mobile phone after her handbag was stolen. Her handbag, which contained
her cell phone, credit card, wallet, Etc.Was stolen.
20 minutes later when she called her hubby, from a pay phone telling him
what had happened, hubby says 'I received your text asking about our Pin
number and I've replied a little while ago.'
When they rushed down to the bank, the bank staff told them all the
money was already withdrawn. The thief had actually used the stolen
cell phone to text 'hubby' in the contact list and got hold of the pin
number. Within 20 minutes he had withdrawn all the money from their
Moral of the lesson:
Do not disclose the relationship between you and the people in your
contact list. Avoid using names like Home, Honey, Hubby, Sweetheart,
Dad, Mom, etc.... And very importantly, when sensitive info is being
asked through texts, CONFIRM by calling back. Also, when you're being
text by friends or family to meet them somewhere, be sure to call back
to confirm that the message came from them. If you don't reach them, be
very careful about going places to meet 'family and friends' who text
you. email@example.com (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)http://fubar.com/blog/249224/981221#viewcomments
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-955216Fri, 16 Jan 2009 10:02:12 -08002009-01-16T10:02:12-08:00NEW FORM OF KIDDNAPING PLEASE READ!NEW FORM OF KIDNAPPING
Please take a minute to read this. This is very scary and could happen to any of us.. Seems like every nice thing people do for one another can be perverted.
A new twist on kidnapping from a very smart survivor:
About a month ago there was a woman standing by the mal l entrance passing out flyers to all the women going in. The woman had written the flyer herself to tell about an experience she had, so that she might warn other women
The previous day, this woman had finished shopping, went out to her car and discovered that she had a flat. She got the jack out of the trunk and began to change the flat... A nice man dressed in a business suit and carrying a briefcase walked up to her and said, 'I noticed you're changing a flat tire. Would you like me to take care of it for you?'
The woman was grateful for his offer and accepted his help. They chatted amiably while the man changed the flat, and then put the flat tire and the jack in the trunk, shut it and dusted his hands off.
The woman thanked him pr ofusely, and as she was about to get in her car, the man told her that he left his car around on the other side of the mall, and ask ed if she would mind giving him a lift to his car.
She was a little surprised and she asked him why his car was on other side. He explained that he had seen an old friend in the mall that he hadn't seen for some time. They had a bite to eat and visited for a while. He got turned around in the mall and left through the wrong exit, and now he was running late.
The woman hated to tell him 'no' because he had just rescued her from having to change her flat tire all by herself, but she! felt un easy. (Trust that gut feeling!)
Then she remembered se eing the man put his briefcase in her trunk before shutting it and asking her for a ride to his car.
She told him that she'd be happy to drive him around to his car, But she just remembered one last thing she needed to buy. (Smart woman!!)
She said she would only be a few minut es. He could sit down in her car and wait for her. She hurried into the mall, and told a security guard what had happened. The guard came out to her car with her, but the man had left. They opened the trunk, took out his locked briefcase and took it down to the police station.
The police opened it (ostensibly to look for ID so they could r eturn it to the man). What they found was rope, duct tape, and knives. When the police checked her 'flat' tire, there was nothing wrong with it; the air had simply been let out. It was obvious what the man's intention was, and obvious that he had carefully thought it out in advance. The woman was blessed t o have escaped harm.
How much worse it would have been if she had ch ildren with her and had them wait in the car while the man fixed the tire, or if she had a baby strapped into a car seat? O r if she'd gone against her judgment and given him a lift?
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life.
A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this to the ladies only; but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters, da ughters, etc.., you may want to pass it on to them, as well.
Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it. Better to be safe than sorry.
PLEASE BE SAFE AND NOT SORRY
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-940549Sun, 21 Dec 2008 17:58:48 -08002008-12-21T17:58:48-08:00Anger Managementthis was emailed to me today, and I wanted to share it PLEASE READ
While a man was polishing his new car, his 4 yr old son picked stone & scratched lines on the side of the car.
In anger, the man took the child's hand & hit it many times, not realizing he was using a wrench.
At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures. When the child saw his father....
With painful eyes he asked 'Dad when will my fingers grow back?'
Man was so hurt and speechless. He went back to car and kicked it a lot of times.
Devastated by his own actions..... . sitting in front of that car he looked at the scratches, child had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'.
The next day that man committed suicide. . .
Anger and Love have no limits; choose the later to have a beautiful & lovely life....
Things are to be used and people are to be loved,
But the problem in today's world is that,
People are used and things are loved.......
Same thing happen to me in Manila, I bought a brand-new car and everytime it has scratches my friends will tell me 'Myla you don't know how to take care of your car.' Then in a traffic jam a passenger Toyota FX tried to make a U-turn to avoid the unmoving traffic I moved forward & when he backed without looking around his vehicle, he hit me. As usual my family & friends asked me why I didn't complain... I could get some money to fix it they say. I simply replied 'He is a driver, working hard to earn a living he couldn't afford to fix my car.' They said 'The operator will.'
What I want to say is, why are we so concerned about cars, protecting it when it should be the one protecting us? Why are they so concerned about the scratches where we should be grateful that it was a shield for me? Why do fathers spending time to wash their cars and polish it where that time should be spent playing with his kids? firstname.lastname@example.org (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)http://fubar.com/blog/249224/940549#viewcomments
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-937762Wed, 17 Dec 2008 06:17:38 -08002008-12-17T06:17:38-08:00What if Life Was Backwards?Life is lived backwards. You'd start out dead and get it out of the way.
Then, wake up in an old peoples' home feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy; go collect your pension, then when you start working, you get a gold watch on your first day.
You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.
At retirement - 18 years of age - you drive the sportscar you can
You eat what you want, you party... and you get ready to start school.
You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no
responsibilities, you become a baby, and then .......
You spend your last 9 months floating peacefully in luxury, in spa-like conditions; central heating, room service on tap, larger quarters every day...
And then, you finish off as an orgasm
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-936567Mon, 15 Dec 2008 07:29:53 -08002008-12-15T07:29:53-08:00WeeWeeChu To Cute!<a href="http://s98.photobucket.com/albums/l259/trecey920/?action=view¤t=weeweechu.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i98.photobucket.com/albums/l259/trecey920/weeweechu.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket" /></a>
It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, 'Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu.'
Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!' said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time,' Pedro begged.
'But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon.' replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me.'
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, 'OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu.'
Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....
'Weeweechu a Merry Chris tmas, Weeweechu a Merry Chris tmas, Weeweechu a Merry Chris tmas, and a Happy New Year!
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-935654Sat, 13 Dec 2008 19:21:00 -08002008-12-13T19:21:00-08:00Woman'sWOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.
Keep reading-they get better!!!
'Cash, check or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers th at he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, 'You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day.
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!
WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The husband said, 'You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says .. 'HEBREWS'
The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, th e man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him
at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece
tag:fubar.com,2010:BlogRSS-249224.post-934958Fri, 12 Dec 2008 13:55:21 -08002008-12-12T13:55:21-08:00TagYou Can Only Type ONE Word.
Not as easy as you might think.
Now copy and paste into your blog and tag 5 ppl to do the same.
Leave a comment to let us know you have done it, AND LEAVE THEM A COMMENT TO LET THEM KNOW THEY HAVE BEEN TAGGED.
It's really hard to only use one-word answers!
1. Where is your cell phone? desk
2. Your significant other? none
3. Your hair? sad
4. Your mother? deceased
5. Your father? deceased
6. Your favorite thing? computer
7. Your dream last night? none
8. Your favorite drink? Cherry Coke
9. Your dream/goal? happiness
10. The room you're in? dining
11. Music? yep
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? living
14. Where were you last night? home
15. What you're not? sad
16. Muffins? cornbread
17. One of your wish list items? money
18. Where you grew up? Ohio
19. The last thing you did? check on son
20. What are you wearing? clothes
21. TV? comedy
22. Your pets? stuffed
23. Your computer? fast
24. Your life? unpredictable
25. Your mood? happy
26. Missing someone? YES
27. Favorite Store? Old Navy
30. Your summer? alright
31. Like someone? yup
32. Your favorite color? blk
33. When is the last time you laughed? today
34. Last time you cried? 2 wks email@example.com (LilBitakaTreceyImMyOwnPriority)http://fubar.com/blog/249224/934958#viewcomments