Oldman's blog: "Dream Job"

Four things about me - Things you may or may not have known about me in no particular order. A) Four jobs I have had in my life 1. Blacksmith 2 Ship cleaner 3 Machinist 4 Cook B) Four films you’d watch again and again 1. Lassie 2. Ghostbusters 3. The green mile 4. life of W Churchill C) Four places you have lived 1 Kenya 2. Cambodia 3. Libya 4. Uganda or in Uk a) Southampton b) Portsmouth c) Berwick on tweed d) Preston (Lancs) They were 4 out of 16 lol D) Four TV shows you love to watch: 1. This old house 2. Dirt busters 3. Any of the News progs 4. Horizon E 4 places you have been on a holiday 1, France 2. Tunisia 3. Italy 4. Ireland E. 4 places you want to visit in this lifetime: 1. Moscow 2. Any part of India 3. Bali 4. Cuba F) Four web sites you visit almost daily: 1. Fubar 2. My space 3. Google 4. Lo-cost flights lol G) Four of my favourite foods: 1. Lobster (any way you want to cook it for me ) 2. Fresh home made pasta tossed in real butter 3. Beef Curry 4. Roast Pork (or Lamb) H) Four places I would rather be right now: 1. In bed 2. Fishing in Holland 3. Driving in open topped car 4. buying a new PC (that dont break down on me) I) Four friends I think will respond: 1. ermmm 2. Ummmm 3. Ahhh 4. Dunno RETURN DIRECTIONS: Cut and paste .... Now, here's what you're supposed to do...! and please do not spoil the fun. Delete my answers and type in your answers. Then send this to a whole bunch of people you know INCLUDING the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little known facts about those who know you.

Liverpool Girls Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties to perform. Terry had married a woman from America, and bragged that he had told his new wife to do the dishes and all the cleaning in the house. He said it took a couple of days but on the third day he came home to a clean house and all the dishes were washed and put away. James had married a woman from Australia and he bragged that he had given his new wife orders to do all the cleaning, the dishes and the cooking. He told them the first day he didn't see any results, but the next day it was better and by the third day his house was clean, the dishes done and there was a huge meal on the table. The third man said the he had married a girl from Liverpool. He boasted that the duties he had ordered her to do were to keep the house cleaned, the dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table every day. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day most of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little bit out of his left eye. Enough to make himself a bite to eat, load the dishwasher and call a gardener.

A young man goes into a Job Center in Jacksonville, Florida, where he finds a listing for a Gynecologist's Assistant. Interested, he asks the guy behind the desk, "Can you give me some more details about this?" The clerk sorts through his files. "Oh yes, here it is. The job involves getting women patients ready for their exams. You have to help them out of their clothes, lie them down, wash their genital areas, and then apply some body lotions. The annual salary is $45,000, but you have to go to Tallahassee.... about 150 miles west of here." "Tallahassee? Is that where the job is?" "No, that's where the end of the queue is."