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| | Do you feel like this sometimes? |
| created @ 01/29/2007 10:06 am |
| mum expired. [EVERYONE] |
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*Warning this is a long ass mum*
:-)
So, I am having a ok day I guess but I get to thinking about the one that got away and I write the poem below... Am I the only one that feels like this about someone that they let get away. Do you have someone you wish you could still be with?
Barren
Sugar words
so barbaric against my tongue
and curdle on my skin.
Deep-seated--
I know its best to just walk away
and be finished with you.
The seething fire
is pressuring me
provoking me
to irrational reflections.
Your essence cleaves
in the night and
its as if you are still here.
I pace these uninhabited corridors
my hands stalking the panels
as if this exhausted townhouse
could sense my anguish.
Its the same day in and out
these silhouettes of you
with someone else.
Loving her as if she,
where the one when you know,
I am cremated on your torso.
My words a breath in your ear
the words that were unvoiced
when you loved me.
Its ok to be superficial
and mask away the ache
or so I recite over
and over again.
Just an eclipse in a living-room
squinting out at the universe
and asking myself
why.
Why did I not put forth
more of myself when it mattered?
How could I just let you go
without saying the truth
I kept jailed away?
Its the security reflex
that I use as lacework
to ambush me
when someone goes too deep
and asks for love.
Its animosity
left on the slope of my tongue
a void shell that thirsts to be left alone
but craves to be desired
inside this barren home.
So exhausting to let you be
just a memory of a sunny day.
A whisper...
Still here-close to me
in the shadows of my own
barren home...
A- I have no idea what you are ranting about?
B- Love sucks and yes I did have someone I loved at sometime. Explain why you think some of us shut down be it chemical, emotional or just the fear of rejection.
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