I am a strong believer in my faith but after my mom died i was so full of guilt.
For months I thought because the doctors wanted to put her on morphine to take her out of her pain and to slowly shut down her organs that We her family killed her. Who were we to play God in these moments.
So it took about 2 years for me to finally come to realize that we made the right decisions and my guilt has subsided.
When I was in my devastation I searched the internet to find a medium to help contact my mom. After countless hours and some research i found one. I called her because I got a good feeling about her when i read her profile and for the fact that she had studied to be a Catholic nun for 5 years and right before she took her vows decided that God was leading her in a different direction. When I called to make the appointment there was a 1 year 3 mo. wait. I was like oh geez I need to go now.
well i got my reading on 6/11/08. I was pleasantly surprised at the information and names she was able to come up with. Gladly my mom was one of the people who came through with messages for me. I was absolutely floored. not only did this person give me the names of people she is with she told me what type of cigarettes my grandfather smoked. and asked me what certain motions that my mom made meant. she even told me my mom was showing her a rose and asked me if we are catholics bc usually that signifies st. teresa. at the time all i thought of was how my mom liked roses. later i realized that my mom is buried with my dad and his mom in st. teresa's cemetary their tombstone has a picture of st. teresa on there because my dad's mom's name was teresa.
I am happy that i went and had this experience. not only did my mom confirm the fact that we made the right decisions i feel at peace in knowing.
