| subject: | TO CHOICES |
| post date: | 2007-02-26 10:51:02 |
| views: 53 comments: 0 ratings: 0 |
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You have two choices in life:
> > You can stay single and be miserable,
> > or get married and wish you were dead.
> >
> > At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
> > "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
> > "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
> >
> >
> > A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
> > "Husband Wanted"
> > Next day she received a hundred letters.
> > They all said the same thing:
> > "You can have mine."
> >
> >
> > When a woman steals your husband,
> > there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
> >
> >
> >
> > A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.
> >
> >
> > A little boy asked his father,
> > "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
> > Father replied, "I don't know, son, I'm still paying."
> >
> >
> > A young son asked,
> > "Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa
> > a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
> > Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
> >
> >
> > Then there was a woman who said,
> > "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
> > and by then, it was too late."
> >
> >
> > Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
> >
> >
> > If you want your spouse to listen and
> > pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
> >
> >
> > Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life
> > thinking they had no faults at all.
> >
> >
> >
> > First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
> > Second guy remarks, "You're lucky. Mine's still alive."
> >
> >
> >
> > A Woman's Prayer
> > Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom, to understand a man, to love and to
> > forgive him, and for Patience, for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray
> > for Strength, I'll just beat him to death.
> >
> >
> >
> > AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
> >
> >
> > Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A
> > blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they
> > find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit
> > onto the bus.
> >
> > So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the
> > husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as
> > he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece
> > of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me
> > crazy."
> >
> > The blind man replies, "If you would've put a rubber at the end of YOUR
> > stick, we'd be riding the bus ... so shut the hell up."
> >
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