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Lone Rider SGA's blog: "Americans!"

created on 06/14/2007  |  http://fubar.com/americans/b91624
SCHOOL ANSWERING MACHINE >> >> (This is hilarious - no wonder some people were offended!) but I think it >> should be on all Schools' recorders !!! >> >> This is the message that the Pacific Palisades High School ( California ) >> staff voted unanimously to record on their school telephone answering >> machine. This is the actual answering machine message for the school. >> This came about because they implemented a policy >> requiring students and parents be responsible for their children's >> absences and missing homework. The school and teachers are being sued by >> parents who want their children's failing grades changed to passing >> grades - even though those children were absent 15-30 times during the >> semester and did not complete enough schoolwork to pass their classes. >> >> The outgoing message: >> >> "Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. >> In order to assist you in connecting to the right stafff member, please >> listen to all the options before making a selection: >> >> * To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1 >> >> * To make excuses for why your child did not do his work- Press 2 >> >> * To complain about what we do - Press 3 >> >> * To swear at staff members - Press 4 >> >> * To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your >> newsletter and several flyers mailed to you - Press 5 >> >> * If you want us to raise your child - Press 6 >> >> * If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone -Press 7 >> >> * To request another teacher, for the third time this year -Press 8 >> >> * To complain about bus transportation - Press 9 >> >> * To complain about school lunches - Press 0 >> >> * If you realize this is the real world and your child must be >> accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior, class work, >> homework and that it's not the teachers' fault for your child's lack of >> effort: Hang up and have a nice day! >> >> *If you want this in Spanish, you must be in the wrong country.

Becoming Illegal

Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator).... The Honorable Tom Harkin 731 Hart Senate Office Building Phone (202) 224 3254 Washington D C, 20510 Dear Senator Harkin, As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you. My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal Alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005. Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year. Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, a s well as "in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son. Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car. If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal(retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance. Your Loyal Constituent, Donald Ruppert Burlington, IA Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service 1-800-289-1040.
The year is 1907...one hundred years ago...read under the picture Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket Theodore Roosevelt's ideas on Immigrants and being an AMERICAN in 1907. "In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American...There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag... We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language... and we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people." Theodore Roosevelt 1907
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