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Some of you have read my blog about male victims of abuse from a female. Today, I received this e-mail from another couple who have had abuse touch their lives. The male is an adult/child abuse victim: Hello you have no clue who we are but let us start out by saying I got a husband I think he should get with you sometime and tell you his story it would help him and he talks about it it allways helps we seen your picture on a blog about abuse he was abused by his father after yr's of it as a child he still has love for him and talks to him everyday if you should ever have a min and would be interested to hear it please let us know thanks and good luck on the book First of all, I need to state right here and now that I am NOT a licensed Psychiatrist, Psychologist, Therapist or Counselor as a paid professional. What I am is a person who has experienced abuse by my mother, my first ex-husband and sexual abuse by my second ex. I am reaching out to others to help them get to the level of peace that I am currently at by writing these books. I have written my own story of abuse story countless times. In fact, one of my male friends used to laugh and say, "I got another novel letter from you in the mail that I'm going to keep for when you become famous." lol When I first thought of writing, I thought of talking about my own female victory but, I found that there were other victims that didn't have as much support as women do today. Those victims are male and those victims NEED to have a place to release the pain and start their recovery. Why have I started advocating for men when I myself was abused by a man? Because I don't hate men. I don't hate women either. However,I do have problems with people who want to down someone who wants to help others and those seeking help. If you are intentionally trying to harm another person in any way by thought, word or deed, maybe you should examine yourself. Sorry, for my little rant here but, I do know that some people have questions about my intent. Now, for people who have a story for me, here is what I want you to do: 1) Open a Word or Adobe document and title it something that helps you remember what it is. For those of you that are still in an abusive relationship, you might want to title it, "Cover Letter for tomorrow" or something that would not raise suspicion of the other person. Your safety is very important to me. -OR- Use a spiral notebook that can be hidden in your trunk, a/c filter compartment or where ever you think it will be safe from eyes. I used the spiral myself because I could keep it handy for lunch break writing and then put it in my work locker. 2) Start writing. Don't worry whether it makes sense or not just write whatever comes to mind. You can write, "Release, Release, release" if that is all you can come up with. Believe me, the words will come. 3) If you feel better keeping a tape recorder, that's fine too. If you are in an abusive relationship right now, a micro cassette player could be a good thing to keep in your pocket. They also offer a small digital pen that you can record into and then upload on to a computer. 4) Keep a log. If you are having a bad day, see if you can think back to a bad experience that happened on that day. Some times our mind blocks things out because of the pain of the moment but it records the event in your mind. Sometimes we will have a repressed memory haunt us on the anniversary. Ok, I think this will get you started. Why do I ask you to write about it? Because you lived it, not me. If I do typed out your story, you miss the healing of seeing it outside of your head and you can edit it as things start coming up in your head. Good luck and keep me updated on your progress!
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