fubar

My all-time favorite song, "Vow" by Garbage. Why is it my favorite? Because its about a woman who chews men up and spits them out. I find that erotic for some reason.



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I'm a 40 year-old single mild-mannered marketing specialist in Tampa, Florida (originally from southern Ohio) who turned to fubar because he was bored during an involuntary 5-week vacation. I quickly learned this place is like Facebook on PCP, crack and snorting Pixie-Stix simultaneously. In other words, it's a drama-filled mindfuck that will kill more brain cells than tequila. If you don't already have AD/HD this site will help you acquire that affliction. Mazel tov.

10 random facts about me:

10. I'm a sexy bald guy with blue eyes. Try not to swoon, ladies.

9. I gravitate toward spiritually knowledgable, exciting uber-sexy goddesses, creative types (i.e. writers, musicians, artists, philosophers), mysteriously strange outcasts, quirky/nerdy people, people with an edge to them, sick senses of humor, and intellectuals with real wisdom to offer. If you possess any of these traits we will be good friends :)

8. During one haze-filled night in college I swear I carried on a conversation with Jim Morrison on my Etch-a-Sketch. Either that or it was Satan.

7. On the weekends I do my best impersonation of a beach log. I just lie there in the sand and work on my tan. My life is tough, I know. Bet you hate me. :)

6. I'm a huge dark beer and microbrew connoisseur and recently bought the equipment for my first home brew. Friend me and tell me your favorite labels.

5. Don't bring your drama. Save it for Bo & Hope, Phantom of the Opera and Jerry Springer.

4. I find the typos "teh" and "liek" extremely funny.

3. I have a profound affinity for good old-fashioned eroticism. It's not about what you show or talk about, it's what you don't.

2. Of course, good old-fashioned gratiutious nudity is still effing awesome

1. The No. 1 item on my Bucket List is dance at Carnival in Rio. If you speak Portugese message me like yesterday.