What is this I'm feeling?
This sudden intensity.....
For the strength I put on,
feelings deceive me.....
A sudden shiver,
then I feel cold.
A story of fear,
a story now retold.
Afraid of feelings?
And feeling regret?
Feeling out of control,
right from the onset.
I keep it inside.
I hold on tight.
Slow suicide.....
Repression is hard.....
This awful sensation,
not felt in a long while.
Without hesitation,
It erased my smile.
I merely looked over,
an old poem of mine.
Then quick as a blink,
sadness flooded my mind.
And what's this on my face?
The idea fills me with fear......
Afraid of this feeling.....
Is that.....
a tear?
Yes it is,
and I connot deny.
A feeling I try not to feel,
has just made me cry.
I'd rather die......
So why?
Why...
a tear?
If I cry I'm sad,
if Im sad, then pain wins.
And if I cry,
I'm vulnerable again......
What's the point in feeling sad,
about one I can never see?
The one I hope,
is never near me.
If he saw the tear,
and thought I still cared......
I'm back to the sadness,
sadness that leads nowhere.
So, what's the point?
Why?
A tear?
